the 10:10 muse

Trade Off

2012-02-02T12:19:00.003-05:00

If you read my post from January 31, 2012, you know I'm currently tracking calories on an iPhone app called MyFitnessPal (www.myfitnesspal.com). Each day I log the calories I've taken in, list any exercise (which has been minimal, I'll admit), and see the results. I'm on a 2050 calorie per day plan so I can lose the excess weight I've gained in the last few years. My goal is to drop below that magic number I swore I'd never cross ... and then to hopefully maintain that new weight through the new eating habits I've learned in the process.

Yesterday as I was logging my dinner (spaghetti with meat, bread with butter, orange juice, and water), I noticed something interesting. Spaghetti in our house is loaded with calories.

We usually take some noodles from a box, boil them in water, add sauce from a jar, and some meat. As I input the ingredients into my iPhone app, they really started to add up. The total noodle calorie count was 1,200. The sauce added another 600 calories. The pound of hamburger was an additional 1,209 calories.

Divide the total calories by the number 6 (the total number of servings this meal made), and you eat 502 calories per serving ...

Now let's get to the trade off part ...

I'm not sure your thoughts on this, but 502 calories for a single serving of spaghetti seems like a lot to me. This really hit home when I started to compare it to some of the other goodness I've tracked during my nearly four weeks on this program.

For the same amount of calories in one serving of spaghetti, you could eat:

5/8 of a pound of BBQ beef
3 Hot, fresh out of the oven, homemade biscuits with peanut butter and jelly
10-1/2 ounces of Orange Leaf Cheesecake flavored frozen yogurt
2-1/4 cups of homemade banana pudding
2 full Twix candy bars (that's four individual Twix bars)
1-1/2 cups of Kroger Fun Munch Cookies-n-Cream ice cream
2-3/4 slices of Chocolate Bread
4 trail mix granola bars
8 donut holes
125 grapes

Now I don't know about you, but the options I just listed all sound much more enjoyable, and potentially more filling, than the single serving of spaghetti.

But alas, we all know you can't simply survive on junk food alone. You have to have balance in your diet, you need protein, carbs, natural sugars, and even a touch of salt. All of this can be found in the spaghetti. Not all of it can be found in the optional list I provided.

In the end, I obviously ate the spaghetti. I even had a double portion; which then shot me way over my daily allowable calorie limit. But I ate the spaghetti, the slice of bread, and drank my water and juice.

Today, however, I wondered exactly what options I could have traded; and made the list. Sometimes we do have to stop and take a look at what we could have had, what we could have done, where we could have ended up. Even if that looking is showing us some place we didn't want to be, someplace we would not be enjoying, someplace we are better off having avoided.

It is through retrospect, through taking a short timeout, that we truly understand how far we've come, how much we've achieved, how good our life truly has become. And if, in taking that moment, we realize we chose poorly, we took the wrong road, we ended up where we should never have come; we can adjust our trajectory and return to the proper path.

Each day we face a trade off. Each day decisions result in moving one direction or another. If you never stop to evaluate, how will you ever know if you made the right decision?

I'm Starving

2012-01-31T19:31:00.004-05:00

We've developed a new term around our house; "American starving" ... when I say we, I mean our 15-year old was the first to use the term. One afternoon he told his mom, "I'm starving. Well, not actually starving, but American starving."

You see, in America we have it so well, it would be virtually impossible for the child of a middle class family to starve to death. To punctuate this point, look around you; go ahead, look.

How many of the people near you look like they've never missed a meal? How many look like they would benefit from fewer calories each day?

I weighed myself just after 2012 started and I had crossed a line I swore I'd never pass. It was the second line I'd created for myself, having passed the first line some 12 years prior; but this line was too far. Something had to change.

Being a new iPhone user (Sprint finally got the iPhone in November 2011), I found an app that would help me track my daily calorie intake and exercise. Not that I really intended to exercise much, but I could track intake easily, so I downloaded the app.

Three plus weeks into the process, including one two-week road trip for work, I've lost 17 pounds from my starting point, and I'm sitting at the milestone weight I swore I'd never cross, the weight that pushed me to start something in the first place.

However, it hasn't been fun. I've spent most of the past several weeks "American starving."

I had to complete a profile when I started, current weight, goal weight, how much I intended to exercise, what type of job I had (sedentary, somewhat active, really active), and how much weight I planned to lose each week. The app then created a daily calorie goal; mine is 2050 calories each day.

Now, when you consider an order of chicken tenders at any bar and grill (Chili's, O'Charley's, Applebee's, etc.) is 900 - 1,100 calories; you can see how hard keeping your intake below 2050 a day, especially when traveling and eating at those types of places because they are the only place open at 11 pm when you finally get off work, can be.

Even house salads, when you add the honey mustard dressing, can run 350 - 500 calories according to my app. Eatting "healthy," it turns out, isn't as healthy as we thought.

So, I spend many days being "American starving." It could be worse, I could actually be starving.

Tonight as you go to bed, make your gratitude list. And when you do, remember to be thankful you have only ever experienced "American starving."

Living for the Red Part?

2011-06-06T11:04:00.003-04:00

If you follow me on Twitter or FaceBook, you know I've spent the last 5 days in the PACU waiting room of University Hospital in Augusta, GA. My father-in-law had a valve replaced and a stint placed in his aorta on Thursday. Complications from the surgery caused him to bleed all day Thursday; bleeding that could not be controlled by medication. As a result, around 11 pm Thursday he was wheeled back into the operating room so the doctors could surgically repair the bleed.

Fortunately, God's hand guided the surgeon and the bleeding was quickly controlled. Unfortunately, it delayed dad-in-law's recovery to such an extent he was not removed from the ventilator until Sunday late morning.

Sitting in a waiting room isn't much fun. Sitting in the same waiting room for 5 days straight is even less fun. I've had the opportunity to watch a lot of YouTube videos, and was really impressed with this Francis Chan video about life; "Living Eternally."

Chan really nails down what Christian's have missed in the modern age. In another Francis Chan video, he talked about how modern American Christianity has become, "add a little Jesus to your life" as opposed to the call of Jesus in Matthew 16:24-27 (The Message)

²⁴Then Jesus said to his disciples, “Those who want to come with me must say no to the things they want, pick up their crosses, and follow me. ²⁵Those who want to save their lives will lose them. But those who lose their lives for me will find them. ²⁶What good will it do for people to win the whole world and lose their lives? Or what will a person give in exchange for life? ²⁷The Son of Man will come with his angels in his Father’s glory. Then he will pay back each person based on what that person has done.

Jesus made it clear: we are not to live for today, we are to live today realizing our choices will impact eternity. I believe Chan's message is dead accurate to Jesus' teaching.

Francis Chan also references Paul's words from Philippians 3:10-16 (The Message)

^10-11I gave up all that inferior stuff so I could know Christ personally, experience his resurrection power, be a partner in his suffering, and go all the way with him to death itself. If there was any way to get in on the resurrection from the dead, I wanted to do it.

^12-14I'm not saying that I have this all together, that I have it made. But I am well on my way, reaching out for Christ, who has so wondrously reached out for me. Friends, don't get me wrong: By no means do I count myself an expert in all of this, but I've got my eye on the goal, where God is beckoning us onward—to Jesus. I'm off and running, and I'm not turning back.
^15-16So let's keep focused on that goal, those of us who want everything God has for us. If any of you have something else in mind, something less than total commitment, God will clear your blurred vision—you'll see it yet! Now that we're on the right track, let's stay on it.

Paul understood our life is temporary here on earth, but permanent beyond our time on earth. Paul knew what he said and did here in life affected his eternity. This from the man who called himself "least" among the followers of Christ.

I too get caught up in the "red part" as Francis Chan demonstrated in his video. Far too often my thoughts are of my next project, how I will pay my bills, where my next meal will be, or just too focused on all the inferior stuff. Far too often I'm more focused on myself than the world around me; a world God has commanded me to love and serve. I need to keep my focus strong, I need to reunite with the goals of God and then live each day striving to achieve them.

Can you imagine what our world would look like if everyone who claims the name of Christ also followed this same path? I have to admit, that is a world I'd truly enjoy living in. Wouldn't you?

Waiting is Hard to Do

2011-06-02T09:20:00.002-04:00

So my lovely bride and I made the drive from Lexington, KY to Augusta, GA last night ... Her father is having heart surgery today, so we came down to be here for that major event. Her brother from Michigan and his wife met up with us in Lexington, so we could all carpool down.

After arriving at 1 am this morning, we were awakened by my bride's parents at 4:30 as they were getting ready to head to the hospital for pre-op. We then lay back down for another hour prior to getting ready and heading out the door shortly after 7 am ... We arrived at the hospital in time to have a prayer session with my bride's father, mother, brother, sister-in-love, my bride, and me ... Her dad was then given his first round of sedation meds and rolled down the hall at 8:20 for surgery.

We headed to the surgical waiting area and found some seats to get settled in for the next 6 hours (the scheduled time for the surgery) ... Unfortunately, a few minutes later, a nurse came in and said a Cath Lab emergency had pushed our surgery back at least 4 hours. Oh, waiting is hard to do!

It seems to me we are often in "wait" mode ... Waiting on a paycheck so we can pay some bills. Waiting on God's answer to our "urgent" prayer request. Waiting on approval of that loan, that college application, that job promotion. "Hurry up and wait" seems to be the American model.

I'm not sure what has caused this "epidemic" of waiting ... Maybe in our effort to make life easier, we've become so successful at the "instant gratification lifestyle" we are actually moving faster than God intended. Maybe the waiting is God's way to show us He remains in control, and all our best plans are futile if He isn't included.

Regardless of the why, I sit here in a hospital waiting room this morning, waiting on another patient's surgery to finish so my father-in-law can once again be wheeled back for his procedure. And after that occurs, we will continue to wait the 4 to 6 hours it will take for his surgical procedure. And if that isn't enough, we will then wait the hour or more while he is in recovery, waking up enough the staff will let us go back and see him.

So here I sit ... Waiting is hard to do !!

Memorial Day 2011

2011-05-30T15:46:00.002-04:00

I have recently had the privilege of rereading the Gettysburg Address by President Lincoln. It is fitting to reflect on this address on Memorial Day.

We in America have unprecedented freedoms! However, those freedoms did not come freely. It is because of those who "gave the last full measure of devotion" we can worship any way we choose, enjoy freedom of the press and freedom to assemble, and enjoy the freedom to overthrow our government every two years if necessary.

Today, as you enjoy a day off work, as you fire up your grill, as you find the next, great sale; remember freedom isn't free. It is only yours to enjoy today because of those brave men and women, living and dead, who struggled so you may be free.

The Gettysburg Address:

Four score and seven years ago our fathers brought forth on this continent, a new nation, conceived in Liberty, and dedicated to the proposition that all men are created equal.
Now we are engaged in a great civil war, testing whether that nation, or any nation so conceived and so dedicated, can long endure. We are met on a great battle-field of that war. We have come to dedicate a portion of that field, as a final resting place for those who here gave their lives that that nation might live. It is altogether fitting and proper that we should do this.
But, in a larger sense, we can not dedicate -- we can not consecrate -- we can not hallow -- this ground. The brave men, living and dead, who struggled here, have consecrated it, far above our poor power to add or detract. The world will little note, nor long remember what we say here, but it can never forget what they did here. It is for us the living, rather, to be dedicated here to the unfinished work which they who fought here have thus far so nobly advanced. It is rather for us to be here dedicated to the great task remaining before us -- that from these honored dead we take increased devotion to that cause for which they gave the last full measure of devotion -- that we here highly resolve that these dead shall not have died in vain -- that this nation, under God, shall have a new birth of freedom -- and that government of the people, by the people, for the people, shall not perish from the earth.

Happy Memorial Day America !!

Learnings from God

2011-05-30T11:06:00.003-04:00

It's been nearly eight months since I've posted, in part due to work, but also in part due to circumstances. It has been a tough eight months.

After losing both cars in the same week last fall (see my previous post, "Tough Week"), we limped by on the one 1996 Corolla we'd purchased for cash. While I was flying from job to job, it was rather easy to be a one car family. However, there were a number of jobs in Illinois, Ohio, and Kentucky where I needed to drive. In most cases, we wound up renting a car so I could get to and from work.

Finally, after six months of renting cars and paying money simply so I could get to work, I'd had enough. I decided it would be better to once again take on a car payment as opposed to continuing to spend on average $300 per month for rental cars. At least we'd be building towards our future by paying on a car we would eventually own.

It all came to critical mass when I would spend three weeks on the road, one in Illinois and two in Ohio. Because this trip fell near Derby weekend, rental cars were nearly three times their normal rate on my preferred Internet sites. It would cost nearly $1,000 for a three week rental!

Once again I began searching Craigslist and Auto Trader looking for a solution. We could buy anther cash car and hope it would be sufficient for my transportation needs. Or we could purchase a slightly more expensive car, say in the $10,000 range, and get a few good years out of the vehicle. With the small down payment we had, we would wind up making $250 a month in payments.

I found a couple of options and began driving around town looking at the possibilities. While our credit has taken a hit in the past several years, we were able to get financing from some national banks. Unfortunately, the banks were not willing to finance the $10,000 vehicles we desired to purchase. It seems a bank is willing to loan more money to a higher risk client because the vehicle has a better collateral rating as opposed to lending less for an older, higher mileage vehicle.

So after visiting several dealers, we wound up in Paris, Kentucky at a small town dealership. Once again we were moved from the $10,000 2002 vehicle to the $18,000 2007 vehicle. However, something was different this time. My wife and I actually listened to the sales pitch, and wound up signing a contract even though the monthly payment was nearly $100 more than we'd agreed upon prior to starting the search. We were now the proud owners of a 2007 Chevy Silverado Extended Cab truck!

I drove the truck to my first jobsite in Illinois and it was fantastic. I usually get very stiff when on a long road trip, but this truck was so comfortable, even after a 250 mile ride, I was still comfortable. It was just as nice the following week when I drove 350 miles into northeastern Ohio for my next project.

It was during that week I received a call from the dealership. The bank had denied the loan after further looking into our financials. As two self-employed people, we had given the dealership copies of our tax returns and the bank had taken a closer look. The income stated on the tax returns did not provide them with sufficient debt to income ratio. We had to find alternate financing or return the truck. Because I was in Ohio for two weeks, I told the dealership I would not be able to return the truck for another week.

A part of the story you will know if you follow this blog is back in January 2006 my wife and I committed to no more debt. We would pay off our existing debt as quickly as possible and not amass any new debt. Ever since September of 2008 when we paid off our Lexus, we had carried no auto debt. Even the three cars we purchased in 2010 were cash cars; two from the insurance settlement on the Lexus and one from income earned.

We now had decided it was acceptable to have debt, as opposed to continuing to spend money on rental cars, provided the debt was offset by the rental expense. It makes sense logically, even financially, but the no debt promise was not only to ourselves, it was to God. It seems that despite our human justification for taking on debt, God had other plans. It was a tough lesson to learn.

So on the Monday after my return, I once again was on Craigslist and Auto Trader looking for cash vehicles. Fortunately, another paycheck had come into our bank account, we would be able to pay cash for something, just not something as great as the truck we were about to return.

In the end, we would up giving the truck back to the dealership, handing them an additional check, and driving off in a 1999 Ford Explorer. I've had the Explorer for a week now, driven it to one Kentucky jobsite as well as around town. It isn't as comfortable as the Silverado, it doesn't get as good of gas mileage as the Silverado, and it doesn't look as nice as the Silverado; but it has no debt.

God has shown Himself to be faithful once again. Did we get the vehicle of our dreams? No! But in the three weeks we owned the Silverado, we only paid for gas and I was able to get to the jobsite in comfort. It was a bridge, in lieu of a rental car, to get us to the place we had the cash for the Explorer. God did show up and bless us, even though we lost a great truck!

Sometimes we don't see the full picture. Sometimes, however, God gives us just enough of a glimpse to let us know He is faithful, He is generous, He has our best interests in mind. Even if it doesn't seem that way in the midst of the moment, God is looking out for us!

Tough Week

2010-10-03T14:33:00.008-04:00

It's been a tough week. It started out well, with the opportunity to fly back to Vegas for the weekend. I was working, but it is always a blessing to be in Vegas (I still call it 'home')! So Friday morning we packed the family into the Jimmy at 5:10 AM and headed to Louisville so I could catch my SDF-PHX-LAS flight on Southwest.

Things went well in Vegas, but when I left, one key piece of the project was left unfinished. I felt a bit unfulfilled leaving once again with remaining work, but the parts I needed to complete the work were not available. It turns out they were found late Tuesday, having been onsite all weekend. Ouch!

About the time I'm receiving an email from the Vegas team telling me the missing gear was found under a desk in their green room, I get a phone call from my lovely bride telling me she is stranded on the side of New Circle here in Lexington. I'm sitting at home, having worked through the day via email on finding a solution for the Vegas team. I'm also stranded because our $1 car had died the previous week, so my wife is driving our only functioning vehicle.

A frantic call to the neighbors allows me to borrow their car (one they've borrowed from a friend for a few weeks as their car is in the shop for body repairs) so I can at least pick up our youngest from his bus stop while my bride waits for the tow truck to pick her up and bring the vehicle home. Having no money, well hopefully enough to pay the tow fee, we feel towing the broken vehicle home is our only solution.

As I'm driving the borrowed car from the neighbors, I decide to call our mechanic. He has stated in the past he is open to allowing payments on repairs, so I hope he will be open to some arrangement today. He is, so I call my wife and have her divert the tow truck to the mechanic's and the youngest and I will meet her there. We actually make it to her spot on New Circle just as the tow truck arrives, so my lovely bride, our youngest, and I drive in the borrowed car; following the tow truck to the mechanic's shop.

After dinner Tuesday night, my wife and I spent the next hour or so pushing the motorcycle up and down the hills in our neighborhood, trying to 'roll start' it. The motorcycle has only been ridden once this year due to the battery having died over the winter. Despite our efforts, it never turned over. We were truly without a vehicle.

The following morning our youngest gets a ride to his bus stop from the neighbor and my lovely bride walks 2-1/2 miles to the nearest bus stop, so she can ride the remaining 2-1/2 miles to her office. I 'tweet' and Facebook our predicament, and by late afternoon a friend has offered his truck to us for the next two days; as long as I have it back to him by Friday afternoon, I can use Barry's truck. This at least provides a short-term solution to our transportation.

I also learn Wednesday afternoon that the motor on the Jimmy will need to be replaced or rebuilt. Replacing it with a used motor will run $2,500 or rebuilding it will run $4,000+ ... neither option fits our current strained budget!

Hoping the $1 car will be an easy fix, I negotiate with the mechanic to swap cars in his garage, provided he will still allow us to make payments on any repairs. However, in a review of our limited funds later that afternoon, my bride and I decide to use the borrowed truck and a $12 tow strap from Wal-Mart to tow the $1 car to the shop; deciding we'll tow the Jimmy home the next night. It was surreal driving away from the shop late that Wednesday evening in a borrowed truck while our two vehicles sat outside side-by-side.

Early Thursday morning I run our youngest to his bus stop, return home to pick up my lovely bride and get her to her office, and then head up to the mechanic's to give him the keys to the $1 car and let him know of our plans. I handed him the keys and he sent his crew outside to take a look. I was told to expect a call later in the day.

Before I was even home, I received a call from the mechanic saying the $1 car also needed a new motor. The timing chain had slipped, bending all the rods. Wow! In two days we've lost both cars ... how discouraging is that?

I called my wife and she immediately went into a back room at work and prayed. I was too stunned and numb to pray much, but throughout the week had been sending up short, "God we need Your help" type prayers. It made me proud to know my bride's initial response in the midst of this crisis was to turn to God! Shortly there after, my wife called and we decided to have the cars towed home and would try to survive the next two weeks (I leave town for two weeks tomorrow) without any cars.

Shortly after that phone call, I received an email from the company I've spent a good part of the past three months working with, saying a large payment was going to be deposited to our account on Friday. I immediately offered a "Thank you Jesus!" prayer, forwarded the email to my wife, and then called her to tell her to check her email.

After we both celebrated on the phone, I began checking Craigslist, eBay, and Auto Trader; looking for cars we could purchase for cash. Our mechanic had contacted his preferred towing company and our two vehicles came on one truck. Before taking them off, the driver asked what I intended to do with the vehicles. I told him I really had no idea and he offered to buy them. I called my wife and she agreed it might not be a bad idea to sell them. I sold the Jimmy, the $1 car, and our broken Windstar (which had sat in the driveway for the past year) to the same guy. The few hundred we got for each was added to a portion of the paycheck I'd just received to provide us with enough to get something cheap, yet reliable.

I spent all of Thursday and Friday looking at Internet sales ads, emailing and calling leads, and even driving in the borrowed truck to go look at some. Everything I found simply wasn't a good fit. Finally, late in the day my lovely bride sent me a text saying her boss' son had a car and because it was for us, he would drop the price $600 off his asking price. I quickly called him up, and went to look at the car as I was on my way to drop off the borrowed truck.

I have to say, the car was clean! There were no tears in the seats or headliner. The carpet was also clean and there were no cracks in the dash or steering wheel. The trunk was clean and the car had its spare and jack. The engine cavity looked clean as well. The owner's manual was even in the glove box. Either someone had paid a lot of money making this car look very clean or someone had really taken good car of this car over the previous 14 years.

However, due to limited time, I didn't drive the car. I did talk it over with the seller, who said he didn't like selling to people he knows, so he wanted to let me know everything that was wrong with the car. He mentioned that occasionally it has trouble starting (possible starter in the future?), the tires have significant wear, and he had recently changed the timing belt but had not finalized the tension on the belts so there was an occasional squeal. I'm paying cash, and my mechanic had told me that in this price range if the car ran I was in good shape, so I thanked him for the information and passed over the money.

I dropped off the truck to Barry and then our oldest took me and our youngest back across town (he and his wife had come for dinner Friday night) to pick up our car. We arrived just as the sun was setting, so I needed to use the headlights. I turned on the car and the headlights, while our youngest played with the radio. On the drive home, I noticed the battery light was on. Our youngest checked the owner's manual and it said to have the battery checked. We made it home, and I showed the car to my bride, our oldest and his wife, and our youngest (who had already seen it as we drove home).

The next morning we got up early to take our youngest to a school club event, and the battery light was still on. When we arrived at the school, we found his group and parked while we waited. Suddenly, I couldn't start the car. The battery was dead. I found someone who had cables and we got a jump. My bride and I immediately headed to a parts store that provides free battery checks and learned the battery was at 0%, but still good; it simply wasn't charging. The store associate then tested the alternator, and sure enough, it had a bad diode.

Bad alternator? This wasn't on the list of issues I'd received the previous night. Now what? I talked it over with my wife; do we keep the car and fix it, or do we give it back and keep looking? I had sent a TON of emails over the previous two days to sellers, and that morning several were beginning to respond.

After a few minutes of talking, we chose to purchase a new alternator and try to fix it ourselves. I know just enough about cars to be able to replace an alternator, especially because this alternator was right up front and easy to access. We put $10 gas in the car (it was running on empty by now) while the engine was running and came home. Our neighbor saw the hood up and couldn't believe what we were experiencing. My bride and I spent the next hour working on replacing the alternator (successfully!) and then I called a friend who is a mechanic and asked him if I could meet up with him so he could check the tension on my belts.

While there was no squeal or chirping, we have to drive to Louisville on Monday (I'm flying to Houston for two weeks), and I didn't want to cause any damage in that round trip because of loose belts. My friend met us at his church and took a quick look, giving his approval at the tension.

Later in the day, we added wiper washer fluid (the tank was completely empty), and noticed it was leaking. Another item that didn't make the list Friday afternoon. A new wiper fluid reservoir costs $65. For now, we will simply go without wiper fluid, but that can't last long. Winters in Kentucky require use of a lot of wiper fluid, all the junk that is thrown up on your windshield from the other vehicles on the road needs to be removed frequently while driving.

So, it's been an emotional roller coaster week here. One thing that has been constant is we have a God who loves us. Too bad that love doesn't also mean that we don't have to face these emotionally challenging situations. I guess our lesson this week is that God is faithful, despite our circumstances. Faithful to still be there for us, faithful to always have our best in mind (however, realizing that best might be delayed until we are made perfect in His presence), faithful to be our source of hope.

God is faithful! Everything else, we just have to take day-to-day.

Celebrate the Small Things

2010-09-13T13:45:00.006-04:00

This weekend I finally decided to tackle the two dripping shower faucets in our house. The one in the master bath has been dripping for almost two years, I only learned of the other drip a month or so ago. But after putting it off for far too long, I grabbed my wife and started taking apart the master bath shower faucet. I showed my lovely bride what I had learned a couple of months ago when I attempted to stop the leak in an effort to surprise my bride.

Several months ago, during a lull in work, I was sitting at home feeling my wife was disappointed in the lack of income, and felt maybe finally fixing the faucet would be a great surprise for her. However, after taking the faucet apart, I found there was no position on the knob that would completely shut off the drip. I theorized at the time we needed a completely new faucet. Knowing it was not in the budget at the time, I simply put everything back together and didn't discuss the findings with my wife.

This weekend, I attempted to show her the same issues I'd found during that previous attempt and, in the process, managed to almost flood the house. After successfully getting the water shut off at the street, I then pulled the entire faucet apart and located several O-rings that could be the source of the leak. We made a quick run to Home Depot, taking the faucet cartridge with us, and made an effort to identify the correct replacement O-rings from their selection.

Upon returning home, I replaced the O-rings on our shower faucet and turned the water back on at the street. There was still a leak, but it appeared to be less than before. We turned the water back off and proceeded to replace the same O-rings in the other bathroom. While tightening the faucet in the hall bath I thought maybe I could tighten the master bath faucet a little more, removing that leak. I went to the master bath with my channel locks and put some force into tightening the faucet. I felt it move; move too much, and had that "feeling," you know the one I'm talking about.

I told my wife I think I just broke this, so stand here as I turn on the water. I grabbed our youngest and had him call his mom on the phone while standing next to me as I went to the street to turn on our water again. I had just started opening the valve, when his mother had him tell me to turn the water off.

I went inside and sure enough, I had broken the solder connection inside the wall. Water would have been flowing inside our walls, causing a big mess had I not immediately turned off the main at the street.

So now an "under $5 repair" required a call to a plumber. I was not able to immediately connect with a plumber I've used in the past on the Hope Springs Church project, so I called a friend who may have connections with local plumbers for a name. He provided me with a friend he uses, and when I connected with the friend, I was told he could come out the next morning for $200. Ouch! Two hundred was more than I had anticipated, but we had just enough money in our account to purchase the new faucet, pay the plumber and put gas in the car for the week. God was providing for our needs!

Sunday morning my bride and I went to Home Depot and picked up the replacement faucet. On the way out of the store, I had the impression I should call my plumber friend one more time. Again, I received his voice message. However, before we left the parking lot, my plumber (Eric) called me back. I explained the problem and he said he could come by today and help for about $80. Awesome!

Eric came over around 1:30 on Sunday, replaced the master bath faucet, and then helped fix the mess I'd also made of the hall bath (I had put it back together incorrectly, causing it not to shut off). The final bill was $85!

So, not only had God made sure we had enough money on hand to pay for the parts and the initial plumber's price, He provided a better solution, allowing us to keep an additional $115 in our bank account!

Sometimes life is in the small things, and we need to celebrate them! Thank you God for providing and thank you Eric for helping us save money!

Double Standard?

2010-09-04T20:34:00.003-04:00

I attend a mega church. It is the largest church in Lexington, Kentucky. I attended a mega church when I lived in Las Vegas. I like mega churches. They usually have the types of programs that are of interest to me. They have the best music in town (with such a large talent pool from which to draw, how could they not?). They are easy to "hide in" if I so choose, yet offer small groups where I can go deep and become genuine with a group of like minded people. I like mega churches.

So when a mega church decides they want to expand, they have outgrown their existing facilities and need to provide more room so more people can become a part of this, why is there so much push back?

The church I attend here in town recently announced they have received a budget of $30 million to purchase and build out a dilapidated former mall here in town. Immediately there were cries of outrage, in the paper, on the radio, and most likely from the pulpits of some of the smaller churches. How could they even consider spending so much? If this property becomes a church, the city (which is experiencing a budget crisis) will no longer be generating property tax revenue. Blah, blah, blah ...

Another church, one of the 10 fastest growing churches in America in 2009, located in Fullerton, California is in a very similar predicament. For 40 years this church has been on the same location. Two years ago their long-time pastor chose to retire. The search group settled on a great replacement, a man with experience growing churches while encouraging them to grow deep in their faith. Within months of the new pastor's first sermon, the church had grown from 1,500 to nearly 2,000 in weekend attenders.

Today, less than two short years into pastor Gene's ministry with the church, they are averaging over 4,000 each weekend.

The church was already in a building campaign when Gene was called. Due to the incredible growth, however, leadership has realized due to issues associated with being land-locked, construction costs, etc. it would not be prudent for them to invest in their current facility. They are seeking a new facility, one with a large laundry list of needs, while attempting to sell their existing facility.

What has been the response? How can we spend so much? Why don't we use the money for the poor and needy?

Here's the deal people:

-Both of these churches have terrific ministries to the poor.
-Both of these churches spend large sums of money in their local communities, providing services and meeting needs rather than standing idly by and letting the government help.
-Both of these churches are following the great commission, not watering down the truth, but holding firm to the gospel of Christ, meeting people where they are and showing them the path to salvation.
-Both of these churches have strong programs both in their community, in their states, in America, and internationally where the least, lost, and last are being served.
-Both of these churches realize that if they expand and reach more people, they will have even more influence in their current ministries and possibly be able to take on even more ministry opportunities.

I realize there will always be a double standard when it comes to churches. People will generally go for the "holier than thou" when it comes to large sums of money. It happened in Jesus' time:

While Jesus was in Bethany in the home of a man known as Simon the Leper, a woman came to him with an alabaster jar of very expensive perfume, which she poured on his head as he was reclining at the table.
When the disciples saw this, they were indignant. "Why this waste?" they asked. "This perfume could have been sold at a high price and the money given to the poor."
Aware of this, Jesus said to them, "Why are you bothering this woman? She has done a beautiful thing to me. The poor you will always have with you, but you will not always have me. When she poured this perfume on my body, she did it to prepare me for burial. I tell you the truth, wherever this gospel is preached throughout the world, what she has done will also be told, in memory of her." (Matthew 26:6-13, New International Version)

Rather than worry about the money being spent, people in Jesus' time, and people of today, need to focus on the ministry. If the ministry is following the great commission, then we should celebrate their success, not condemn them! However, if the ministry is simply building an empire, we need to then get on our knees and ask God to intervene.

There will always be false prophets. There will always be self-serving preachers. There will always be men and women who claim to be from God but are not. The only test is the one offered by Jesus,

Beware of false prophets who come disguised as harmless sheep but are really vicious wolves. You can identify them by their fruit, that is, by the way they act. Can you pick grapes from thornbushes, or figs from thistles? A good tree produces good fruit, and a bad tree produces bad fruit. A good tree can’t produce bad fruit, and a bad tree can’t produce good fruit. So every tree that does not produce good fruit is chopped down and thrown into the fire. Yes, just as you can identify a tree by its fruit, so you can identify people by their actions. (Matthew 7:15-20, New Living Translation)

The only test of a person, or a church, is the way they act. Those that are serving others, opening free clinics for the poor, going into the community in mass on work days, giving a cup of water in Jesus' name; those churches need to be celebrated, even when they invest $30 million or $40 million on new facilities. It is only through providing the facilities to minister to people they will be able to continue to produce good fruit!

Love Your Neighbor As Yourself

2010-09-03T11:49:00.009-04:00

A friend posted an interview with Francis Chan on his blog recently, so I watched the video, What's Next for Francis Chan. It is a discussion about what Francis is doing now that he is leaving Cornerstone Church in Simi Valley and moving towards launching a new work in the inner city of Los Angeles.

I was moved by Francis' words about learning that as American's we are focused too much on ourselves and on obtaining more "stuff," in part because that is where my lovely bride and I have come in our journey. I was so impressed by the words Francis shared, I emailed the link to my wife. Last night over dinner, we discussed what she had seen.

Not knowing who Francis Chan was, my wife was not as impressed as I was at his commitment to begin to focus living on less so he could be generous with more. My bride decided to look for more sermons and videos by Francis and ran across the following link, Lessons From Uganda. This sermon, more than the video my friend had posted, moved my wife to tears. She asked me to listen, so this morning I played the audio track while eating breakfast. Immediately, I had to post a blog.

In Lessons From Uganda, Francis demonstrates true religion, as described in James 1:27, "Pure and genuine religion in the sight of God the Father means caring for orphans and widows in their distress and refusing to let the world corrupt you." (New Living Translation) Mr. Chan then ties that with the greatest commandment:

"Teacher, which is the greatest commandment in the Law?" Jesus replied: " 'Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.' This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: 'Love your neighbor as yourself.'All the Law and the Prophets hang on these two commandments." (Matthew 22:36-40, New International Version)

Francis then challenges his congregation to put themselves into the text from Matthew. What does loving your neighbor as yourself look like, practically speaking? How do I live that way on a daily basis?

Francis talks about the pleasure of supporting four orphaned children, a family of kids who lost their parents to HIV/AIDS, in Uganda. He tells of the pleasure of meeting them, spending time with them, buying them clothes, food and pizza. He shares that it truly is more blessed to give than to receive (Acts 20:35)! His prayer is the joy he and the team that accompanied him to Uganda experienced will permeate the rest of the Cornerstone family and they will become a church that truly demonstrates true religion.

It breaks my heart there are so few churches today who desire to demonstrate true religion. You may hear them say, I am loving my neighbor, why do you think we get together all the time in this place? We come together and encourage each other.

However, if you read the corresponding passage of love God, love your neighbor from Luke you will notice Jesus is asked, "Who is my neighbor?" In response, Jesus tells the parable of the Good Samaritan.

If you remember the story, it is a stranger from another land, a land filled with people who are despised by the Jews, who demonstrates himself a neighbor. It wasn't the two religious men, it was the "enemy." I conclude that our neighbor then is anyone we see who is in need; the homeless man (or woman, or children) on the street. Yes, that dirty person who is going to take your money and buy alcohol or drugs. That is your neighbor. How does loving them as yourself look, practically speaking?

Wait, what are you saying? I'm saying the same thing as Francis Chan, the same thing as Jon Weece (Southland Christian Church in Lexington, Kentucky), the same thing as Jesus. If you want to experience the joy of true religion, if you want to find the abundance Jesus promises in John 10:10 (the inspiration for this blog's title), you have to love God and then love people. But just loving people isn't enough. You have to love them as yourself.

And that is the hard part. Loving people, especially if we consider throwing a few dollars at them love, is something American's have demonstrated an ability to do. But to get dirty with them, to step into their lives and become a part of that scene, to truly show strangers the same level of love I show myself (whom I deny nothing); that is hard.

But Francis has found in doing so, he has found so much! Francis ended his Lessons From Uganda with another Jesus quote, one I find appropriate as well to challenge you today:

"Jesus said to all of them, "If people want to follow me, they must give up the things they want. They must be willing to give up their lives daily to follow me. Those who want to save their lives will give up true life. But those who give up their lives for me will have true life. It is worthless to have the whole world if they themselves are destroyed or lost." (Luke 9: 23-25, New Century Version)

How are you doing in following the greatest commandment? What things do you need to rearrange in your life so you are honestly loving God and loving your neighbor as yourself; in such as manner as to be holding nothing back? I believe Jesus, and I believe Francis Chan; if you love in this way, if you practice true religion as God the father has defined, you will find abundant life!

Will you join me, my lovely bride, Francis Chan, Jon Weece, and so many others in this journey?

God Provides

2010-09-02T11:44:00.004-04:00

Being out on the road for almost three weeks in August did a number on our finances. Having not worked very much earlier in the year, we had exhausted our reserves. However, when I'm on the road, I need to be able to eat. I do my best to keep my meals costs limited, but $20 to $25 dollars a day is pretty much a requirement.

Unfortunately, not all hotels provide breakfast. When I get to stay at one that does, my daily expenses are lowered. This is a good thing. Unfortunately, of the hotels I used on the last trip, only 1 of 3 provided breakfast. At the rest, I used their resident Starbucks, adding $5 to $8 to my daily needs.

In addition, I had some expenses I had to pick up, gas in three rental cars, the cost of one of the rental cars, and some job site supplies. It all added up.

In order to make due, I used money that would have otherwise gone to pay our utilities. No, this is not a fiscally sound idea, but it was necessary this time out. I arrived home on Thursday evening, and the phone and electric were scheduled to be shut off on Monday. Over the weekend, my lovely bride and I went through our finances in an effort to find the money for these two bills that had reached critical need.

As He has done so many times over the last five years, God stepped in to provide. By shifting funds from one account to another, we were able to pay the phone and electric bills, holding off the disconnect. We currently only have $4 in one account, $5 in each of two other accounts, and $11 in savings; but we have a phone, Internet, and electricity.

Today is payday for my lovely bride, and the money will be used for food, gas in the vehicles, pay our water bill (today is the last day before that is disconnected) and gas utility bill. That should be sufficient to get us through another week until she is paid again.

I have a local job next week, so out-of-pocket expenses should be at a minimum. I am also waiting on payment for my time and expenses for the jobs in August, so cash is on the way.

It never ceases to amaze me how close we come to the edge before God jumps in with a miracle. After five years of finding Him to rarely be early, but never late; I still am in awe each time He shows up. That's a good thing, I imagine. I'd hate to wake up one day having taken God for granted. I always want to sit in wonder at His greatness, His love, and His generosity.

Where is God showing up in your life? Are you recognizing His presence and presents in your life, or are you simply taking the blessings He offers for granted? Find something in your life that is there because of God and take the time today to thank Him. You'll be glad you did!

Living a Public Life

2010-09-01T13:27:00.002-04:00

There has been a lot of press lately about people losing jobs or receiving some disciplinary action due to Facebook and/or Twitter posts. I'm sure the same could be said about their blog posts, too.

It is unavoidable that if you live your life in the public forum, you can face consequences by those who feel the information you've shared should not have been public.

That is why when I post about jobs, I only say the city, have not said the company name (although those who are close to me know it, and once or twice the company name has been posted by someone else on my Facebook page in response to a status update), and make every effort to share my joys and passions of my job while trying to keep some anonymity for others.

My wife has taken another approach. She simply does not have a Facebook or Twitter account, nor does she blog. In fact, she has asked me to never post pictures on my Facebook that include her. She's asked the same of our three sons, but they have ignored her request.

It seems technology has once again taken society into a place where things are moving so quickly, people simply do not have either the time nor the ability to contemplate consequences of their use of the technology. I recently heard an executive from Google state it will become commonplace for people to legally change their names when moving from childhood to adulthood, simply so they can escape the public persona they've created online.

In a world where Facebook, Twitter, and other social media sights have become marketing tools for companies and individuals; where people are often able to either find a job, or lose a job, because of a status update or tweet; where everything some people do is played out in a public forum; isn't it strange we are still so isolated? I have 283 friends on Facebook, follow 58 people on Twitter and have 67 Twitter followers, yet many times I feel isolated. Sure there are people out there who know what I post online, but do they know the real me? Will they pick up the phone at 3 AM when I'm in crisis because of some bad news I've just received? Do my Facebook and Twitter friends have "refrigerator rights?"

Unfortunately, the answer is no. I honestly have very few face-to-face friends who I've offered refrigerator rights. So living a public life, having Facebook and Twitter accounts, posting on a blog regularly, having published a book; none of these things provide true friendship, true camaraderie. It is only through a deep relationship with God, only through seeking His will for my life each day, only as a result of my daily time in His word and through prayer that I find truth. That time is the most valuable of my daily pursuit. Time with God, time with my lovely bride, time with our youngest (the only son still living at home); those things will determine how satisfying my life will be.

Everything else, all the public posts, the 140 character updates, the blog ramblings; those things are a part of who I am, they are not who I am.

Are you living a public life that is a lie? Are you "hiding" in public, afraid to go deep with someone God has placed in your life? Are you running from God and not spending time with Him? Find out what really matters, everything else will become more focused!

Re-Entry

2010-08-31T10:07:00.003-04:00

My job requires long hours and frequent travel; that is when I'm working. I'm an independent contractor and do not have constant employment.

My last trip was scheduled to be 13 days. I flew out of Louisville to Chicago to join the team. The next morning we flew to Houston for a week-long project. On Saturday one of the guys and I drove to Dallas where we would join the team we'd work with during our second week.

Fast forward to Thursday, week two. Around 4 pm one of the corporate guys who is onsite asks me when I'm scheduled to fly home. I tell him Saturday at 1:30. Two hours later he asks me if I'd be OK if they flew me to Las Vegas to work Friday and Saturday and I'd fly home on Sunday, one day later. I quickly called my wife (I don't make decisions like that without consulting her, it's her life too!) and we both agreed the extra day of pay was good at this time in our life and one extra day away wouldn't be too strenuous on our lives.

So at 6:15 am the next morning I'm on a flight out of Austin, Texas headed to Phoenix, Arizona and then on to Las Vegas. Once onsite, it became apparent two days was not sufficient to complete the work necessary for this project. Late Saturday night I get a text asking if I would be willing to take Sunday off and stay over into the following week to help finish the project. The company would fly in additional resources to help. Once again, I called my wife and we quickly discussed the situation. We decided that as long as I could come home on Thursday (my 18th day out), it would be acceptable.

I took Sunday off, spending time with my brother-in-law, niece and nephews in Las Vegas, doing some laundry, and trying to simply relax. The "new recruits" arrived Monday morning and we worked hard through the week, finishing around 3 am Thursday morning.

I caught my flight from Las Vegas to Detroit and then on to Louisville where my lovely bride and youngest son picked me up. We stopped for Dairy Queen (my wife wanted some) on the drive home to Lexington and pretty much all went to bed once home.

Today is the fifth day since my return and I'm still struggling to find a "home rhythm" ... our work schedule is simple: 12 - 15 hour days, some food, phone calls home, maybe some email time, and sleep. Home is more complicated. Home is dishes, laundry, taking our youngest to the bus stop, being emotionally available to my family even when I'm still tired from my trip.

I'm reminded of the line from the journey song, Faithfully, that says, "Two strangers learn to fall in love again." That is what it seems like each time I'm out for long periods of time; I have to re-enter my family. I have to learn their schedules, their rhythms, their needs.

Please don't hear me complaining. I love my family and I love my job. I truly enjoy the time I'm on the jobsite and continue to hope and pray for more work. I also enjoy the time I'm home with family. Today was simply a day to reflect, a day to process this re-entry phenomenon.

My next job is a local job. I'm working on a project here in Lexington next week. It will still be the same 12 - 15 hour days, only this time I'm sleeping in my own bed. It has been a year since I did a local job, and I honestly don't remember if working locally was easier or harder on the family. In some ways I'm here, even though I'm not at dinner, not available to run that errand, not available to say goodnight to my son or my lovely bride.

I love my family and I love my job. I just hope and pray that as more work comes my way, we find a better way to face re-entry ... it is by far the hardest part of this life.

Miracles All Around

2010-08-15T11:23:00.007-04:00

I've been on the jobsite this past week. We usually work 12 hour days while doing system integrations, so blogging is difficult. I have been able to maintain my daily Bible reading, making sure I'm up enough before call time to spend my 1/2 hour with God each morning.

Despite the long hours, I love what I do, working with different churches across the country. Last week I was in Katy, Texas, just outside Houston and this week I'm in Temple, Texas, south of Dallas.

This trip has been tough, however, because it has been several months since I've had an income. My business credit cards are maxed and the bank account is empty. I've managed, but Friday night there was a crisis. I was to rent a car at Hobby Airport in Houston to drive on Saturday to Love Field in Dallas. I was provided the confirmation from my employer for the rental car, and since the reservation came via Hotwire, I didn't think twice about the payment.

Unfortunately, when I arrived at the rental counter, I was required to pay the rental fee. It had not been prepaid with the reservation. Now, a normal one day rental is only a few dollars, but because this was a one-way rental, the charge was $145. I didn't have that much on a credit card nor did I have that much in my business checking. I ended up using my personal debit card, pulling from money my wife would need for the week.

The miracle happened when I arrived in Dallas. My employer had reserved a full-size car for us, but they only had mid-size cars in Houston. Because the Houston Hobby rental agent was so difficult to work with, I chose to address the issue when I returned the car in Dallas. After checking in with the lot attendant at Love Field, I went into the rental office. The agent there was more than willing to help and after talking to the manager started a $25.00 refund to the account.

After a few minutes of typing on the computer, the agent in Dallas called for her manager to come check her work before completing the ticket. The Dallas manager came, made a few changes to the process, and as he walked away told me it had come out even better.

When the very helpful rental agent printed out my receipt, they had deducted $55.00, not the original $25! My first cash-flow miracle of the week.

As I was talking to my wife on the phone (she had graciously listened to my diatribe Friday night as I vented having to pay personally for the vehicle plus having a smaller car for the drive the following morning), sharing with her the blessing of the $55 savings, she also told me about a second miracle.

Again, because I've not been working consistently for a few months, we had fallen behind in our mortgage. We had been working with the mortgage company for a loan modification, and late this week received a letter saying they had deferred our back payments!

It appears that with the work I've completed last week, the work I am about to begin in a few short hours, and the upcoming project I have at the beginning of September, we will not only be able to get our bills caught up, we will possibly have a little extra to be able to rebuild our "rainy day fund."

And building that fund is good, because as many of you can attest, it is currently raining. Fortunately, in the midst of the rain, God provided my family a rainbow! I hope you are able to find rainbows in the midst of your storms as well!

Silver Was Worthless

2010-08-12T08:21:00.006-04:00

I'm reading I Kings currently, and today I read about Solomon's wealth. I Kings 10:21 struck me, "All of King Solomon’s drinking cups were solid gold, as were all the utensils in the Palace of the Forest of Lebanon. They were not made of silver, for silver was considered worthless in Solomon’s day!" (New Living Translation)

Earlier in the chapter, in verse 10 we learn why silver was worthless, "The gold that came to Solomon in one year weighed 49,950 pounds." (God's Word Translation) If you had your abundance of gold, why would you need silver?

Curiosity got the best of me and I went to www.GoldPrice.org to find the current price for gold. It was $1,205.00 per ounce. Multiply that by 16 ounces in a pound, and Solomon's annual gold income, in today's values, would have been $963,036,000. Nearly a billion dollars a year came to Solomon in gold! (Author's Note: other translations say: "each year" as opposed to the God's Word translation of one year, hence my converting this to an annual income.)

I guess if I was making a billion dollars a year, I too would consider silver to be worthless.

Unfortunately, as I was closing my Bible this morning, I noticed the heading for chapter 11: Solomon's Idolatry. I guess that explains the words of Agur, son of Jakeh, in Proverbs 30:7-9 (New Century Version):

"I ask two things from you, Lord.
Don't refuse me before I die.
Keep me from lying and being dishonest.
And don't make me either rich or poor;
just give me enough food for each day.
If I have too much, I might reject you
and say, 'I don't know the Lord.'
If I am poor, I might steal
and disgrace the name of my God."

Oh had Solomon used his wisdom in his youth to understand that in riches there are many traps. Unfortunately, he didn't learn that lesson until the end of his life. Thirty-two times he uses the word meaningless in the New International Version's translation of the book of Ecclesiastes. "Like chasing after the wind" is used nine times in that same translation. Solomon learned, through much pain, true wisdom comes from God; wealth and things usually lead us away from Him.

Today my prayer was that of Agur from Proverbs. I hope that is your prayer as well!

Free Samples

2010-08-07T17:22:00.004-04:00

I was listening to the radio the other day in the car when the DJ started talking about free samples. She said many sales in America are a direct result of free samples. I'm not sure if her premise was based on a study or simply personal observation.

However, if free samples didn't work, weekends at Sam's Club and Costco would be very different. I have friends who go to the "Costco buffet" on a regular basis. Last weekend my wife and I were not shy at our local Kroger, taking several of the samples offered. If the cost of these displays was not profitable, you wouldn't see them.

Because I was listening to a Christian station, the DJ then made the spiritual application. If we want people to know God, we need to make sure they get free samples too. She quoted Psalm 34:8: "Taste and see that the Lord is good. Oh, the joys of those who take refuge in him!" (New Living Translation)

Think about it, what is the reputation of Christianity in the world today? Not very good. In fact, a very famous convert from atheism to Christianity, Anne Rice, recently made a very public departure. Let me be clear, Anne didn't quit Jesus, she simply quit organized religion. In her statement on her Facebook page, Anne wrote:

"For those who care, and I understand if you don’t: Today I quit being a Christian. I’m out. I remain committed to Christ as always but not to being “Christian” or to being part of Christianity. It’s simply impossible for me to “belong” to this quarrelsome, hostile, disputatious, and deservedly infamous group. For ten years, I’ve tried. I’ve failed. I’m an outsider. My conscience will allow nothing else."

Anne continued the dialog on Facebook, placing the following post:

"As I said below, I quit being a Christian. I’m out. In the name of Christ, I refuse to be anti-gay. I refuse to be anti-feminist. I refuse to be anti-artificial birth control. I refuse to be anti-Democrat. I refuse to be anti-secular humanism. I refuse to be anti-science. I refuse to be anti-life. In the name of Christ, I quit Christianity and being Christian. Amen.”

Anne reaffirmed her faith in Christ despite a lack of faith in Christianity with another Facebook post:

"My faith in Christ is central to my life. My conversion from a pessimistic atheist lost in a world I didn't understand, to an optimistic believer in a universe created and sustained by a loving God is crucial to me. But following Christ does not mean following His followers. Christ is infinitely more important than Christianity and always will be, no matter what Christianity is, has been, or might become."

I doubt Anne's feelings are hers alone. Far too many people have publicly said they would follow Jesus if it were not for the "Christians" they knew. It seems to me the biggest deterrent to modern people following Jesus is his church.

This is such a departure from the early days of the church. In Acts 2:46-47 we read: "The believers met together in the Temple every day. They ate together in their homes, happy to share their food with joyful hearts. They praised God and were liked by all the people. Every day the Lord added those who were being saved to the group of believers." (New Century Version)

What has moved us from "were liked by all the people" to "I'd gladly follow Christ except for all the Christians I've met in my life"? I think we've forgotten about free samples.

Jesus told us how to change the world. He didn't call us to assemble in big, beautiful buildings with great sound systems. He didn't call us to give money so the "professionals" can handle the ministry. Jesus very simply said, "And if anyone gives even a cup of cold water to one of these little ones because he is my disciple, I tell you the truth, he will certainly not lose his reward." (Matthew 10:42, NIV).

In James we read, "Pure and genuine religion in the sight of God the Father means caring for orphans and widows in their distress and refusing to let the world corrupt you." (James 1:27, New Living Translation)

If we get back to offering free samples: giving drinks of water in Jesus' name; caring for the widows (and single moms) and orphans (and children of single moms); and helping the last, the least, and the lost among us, I believe people like Anne Rice will applaud our efforts, quite possibly even stepping up to help.

I know my lovely bride and I are making the decision to do more. Will you help us?

Living A Better Story

2010-08-05T11:27:00.012-04:00

Please bear with me as I'm going to deviate slightly from my usual blog posts today. If you follow this blog regularly, you know I generally write about my daily struggles as I strive to live into the abundance Jesus promised in John 10:10. My slight deviation will be that in addition to speaking to how I want to view my life, I will also be telling about how attending a conference in Portland, OR this September could help me better achieve a better life "story."

I recently read Don Miller's book A Million Miles in a Thousand Years and was impressed by his understanding of how life is a story we have the ability to control, rather than simply letting life control us. I posted about this on June 30, 2010 in the post Where I Am Right Now. I discussed how so often my life is simply flying by and I'm going to wake up one day and wonder where it all went.

I then ran across a post by Don Miller on his blog (see Don's blog here) about a contest to win a trip to Portland, OR for his upcoming Living a Better Story Seminar (see conference details here). So today I enter that contest with this blog. But before you read my post, please watch the video from Don.

Living a Better Story

My life has changed significantly in the past 8 years. I used to be consumed with the American dream, building a stable "nest egg" for myself and my family. By age 24 I had a house, a truck, a car, and a boat. My good friend and I would spend weekends at the lake, having loaded his two jet skis in the bed of my truck that also towed my 17-1/2 foot jet boat with a 455 Oldsmobile engine. Our lives consisted of fun, sun, and beautiful beaches!

It seemed like I had it all back then, but in reality, I had nothing! Fortunately, I have since learned that true life isn't in seeking personal pleasure, it is in helping others find their path.

Eight years ago I lost my job, it was the second job I'd lost in four months. My new bride and I were now strangers in a new state, with a new home, no friends locally, and a "million miles" from family.

Yes, I'd doubled my income in a matter of three years; but simply having a great paycheck wasn't enough. In doubling my income, we'd also doubled our debt. We were drowning in the American dream!

It was then we truly began to look at our lives and realize something was significantly wrong. We had been striving towards incorrect goals. We both sat down, confessed our sins to our Heavenly Father, and decided on that day we would begin to pursue His goals for our lives.

We decided to "cap" our income, committing to donate everything we earned over and above that level directly to God-related programs. We began the painful process of paying off our mountain of debt, including cutting up our credit cards. We felt lead to open a small business in order to secure our financial future plus ensure we had the ability to fulfill our donations commitment.

God's response to our actions? He spent the next five years cutting our income in half. We didn't grow our income, realize financial independence, and gain the ability to give generously from our excess. Rather, we have almost hit rock bottom, daily struggle to meet our obligations, and often wonder how it all "went wrong."

However, if you follow me, you know that in the midst of the financial fall, we committed to give from what we had, and continue to support three important projects today, despite the significant cuts to our revenue streams.

This brings us to my better story and how the Better Story Seminar can help. I desire to continue to learn how to strive to achieve my goals, despite outside setbacks. I believe that despite the circumstances, my bride and I are on the right path. I believe our lives need to be devoted to helping the less fortunate; finding new ways to share with others; and spread the word that a life devoted to helping the last, least, and lost is the only life worth living.

I believe the insights and new tools I would be introduced to at the Better Story Seminar can be the impetus to help me achieve the next level on my journey. As you see from my June posting, I've kind of hit a rut this year. If you continue to read my daily struggles through July, however, you will also notice that despite continued setbacks I continue to hold on to the promise that better things can be achieved.

If I were to win this contest and be at the seminar in Portland, I hope to find tools that help me remain "on story" even in the midst of life's assaults. I also hope to be able to connect with others and learn their story and how they continue to remain focused in the midst of day-to-day issues. Most importantly, I believe the "high" I would expect from being at a conference with great speakers and others from around the world who also want to live a better story would catapult me further into my story.

It's hard to limit the story and the benefits of a seminar into a blog post; I feel I could type on for an eternity. However, I also realize that simply typing isn't all I'm called to do. I have to also get off the couch, go outside, and interact with those I'm called to help. I hope to see you in Portland so we can share about our successes, our trials, and encourage each other in our stories!

When Did We Forget How to Share?

2010-08-05T10:21:00.003-04:00

From our earliest days on earth, we are taught to share. Little children on play dates are always being instructed by their parents to share their toys. In kindergarten, teachers continue the instruction to their charges; share the crayons, share your glue, share.

Even as we grow older, we continue to share. In part, due to the fact there are not enough books for every student, we share text books throughout our education. Some friends share clothes, passing them around their small circle. In college, several of us shared our cars with other students who didn't have a car on campus.

Somewhere in our life, however, this training that was so instilled in us as children is lost. As an adult, I don't remember the last time I shared something of mine, whether it was with a friend or family member.

Yet we are taught by Jesus that everything we have is from our Father in Heaven. The Bible says: "Yet for us there is but one God, the Father, from whom all things came and for whom we live; and there is but one Lord, Jesus Christ, through whom all things came and through whom we live." (I Corinthians 8:6, NIV) So if everything is from the Father, why do we hoard things for ourselves once we become adults?

Shouldn't we follow the teachings from our youth and share? If a friend has need of transportation, shouldn't we let them use our car? If we learn someone needs a place to sleep, shouldn't we offer our "guest bedroom" to them? If we see someone on the street who is hungry, shouldn't we get them some food?

I know you cynics out there will offer many excuses as to why you shouldn't help strangers, especially those who live on the street. And yes, in today's world there are many dangerous people, so I agree care should be taken. But in Hebrews 13:1-3 we read: "Stay on good terms with each other, held together by love. Be ready with a meal or a bed when it's needed. Why, some have extended hospitality to angels without ever knowing it! Regard prisoners as if you were in prison with them. Look on victims of abuse as if what happened to them had happened to you." (The Message)

How many times have we missed an opportunity with an angel because we forgot what we learned as children? Find someone with whom to share your riches today, I have a feeling you might just get more out of it than they do!

Sometimes Trouble Comes Our Way

2010-08-01T09:06:00.007-04:00

I mentioned in a recent post I've been reading the book of Judges each morning for my daily time with God. Judges is a hard book to understand sometimes. There are stories that make you sit back and ask, "How am I supposed to glean some spiritual insights from this? How does this story of death, mayhem, and debauchery help me become a better Christian?

Judges 19 - 20 is just one such passage. A Levite takes a concubine. She then leaves him and returns to her father's house. The Levite pursues her and after several days at her father's house (which in and of itself is a confusing tale), begins the long journey home. Not having enough daylight to make the entire journey, the traveling group spends the night in Gibeah (a city of the tribe of Benjamin).

During the night, the men of Gibeah come to the house where the Levite and his group are staying and demand the owner of the house send the Levite out so they may "have sex with him," Judges 19:22 (God's Word Translation). The owner of the house tells the men they should not do this wicked thing to his guest and offers his virgin daughter to them instead. The men refuse, and only after the concubine has been sent out do the men leave.

The following morning the Levite gets up to prepare to leave and finds his concubine laying dead at the door. He takes her home, cuts her into twelve pieces, and distributes the pieces to the twelve tribes of Israel; (it's in the bible people, check it out for yourself).

The tribes of Israel assemble and ask, "Tell us how such an evil thing could happen," Judges 20:3 (God's Word Translation). The Levite tells the story and the people say they will attack Benjamin.

Prior to making the final preparations for war, the tribes pray to God and ask, "'Who will go first to fight Benjamin?' The Lord answered, 'Judah will go first.'" (Judges 20:18, God's Word Translation)

Israel attacks with Judah in the front and the much smaller force from Benjamin routes them, killing 22,000 men the first day. Israel cries out to God, "'Should we continue to wage war against our close relatives, the men of Benjamin?' The Lord answered, 'Go fight them!'" (Judges 20:23, God's Word Translation)

On the second day, Israel (remember, they are following God's directions here) attacks Benjamin. Once again, the much smaller force of Benjamin (Israel brought 400,000 soldiers, Benjamin had 26,700 men) routed their Israelite brothers, killing another 18,000 men.

That evening, the men of Israel retreated and came to the Ark of the Lord where they "fasted that day until evening then they sacrificed burnt offerings and fellowship offerings to the Lord." (Judges 20:26, God's Word Translation) After a day of fasting and sacrifice, the Israelites asked God if they should continue the battle and He responded, "'Go! Tomorrow I will hand them over to you.'" (Judges 20:28, God's Word Translation)

The men of Israel had assembled to "right a wrong" done in their country. Prior to marching, they had sought God's council and followed His directions. Despite taking the appropriate steps, 40,000 men lost their lives in battle as a much smaller force routed them. If anyone had a right to cry, "God, why do the godless prosper when the Godly perish?" it was this group of Israelite soldiers.

As I prayed to ask God why this story exists this morning, I heard "sometimes trouble comes our way." There are Christians out there who preach that once you become a Christian, with enough faith, only blessings will come. Follow God and you will receive untold riches, blessings, and be healthy.

To them I say, read Judges 19 - 20. These men followed God, offered sacrifices, they even fasted. And yet they were routed by a smaller, evil force. Or read the books of Paul. Did ever a more zealous, Godly man live? Yet he was beaten, shipwrecked, hungry, and endured a "thorn in the flesh" that God refused to remove. If the Apostle Paul cannot get God's healing, how much faith does it take?

Yes, God is in control. But despite that, sometimes bad things come our way. They may simply be to show us that God is in control. Imagine if the Israelite army had won on the first day. The victory would not have been God's it would have been theirs. However, because they took three days, there was no question who brought the victory.

My wife and I have spent five years praying and asking God to bless us so we can in turn bless those around us. I finally came to the conclusion that I needed to bless those around us with the means God had given us right now, and not wait until I had more. Has God responded by growing our wealth, giving us more with which to bless others? No, He has actually continued to shrink our income, shrink our assets, and I think shrink our influence. Yet we remain faithful, continuing to fund the initiatives we started a few years ago despite the smaller income.

Times are tough, funds are tight, we are behind on some important bills. But each month we give our first fruits to God, add the offerings we committed to the causes we feel are appropriate based on God's teaching, and then pray the rest is sufficient to meet our needs.

Sometimes trouble comes our way. The true test of our Christianity is how we react in those times. Are you facing trouble victoriously or have you caved in to humanistic fears? Turn back to Jesus, call to him for forgiveness and follow his teachings. Then you have the opportunity to achieve victory!

Forcefully Advancing

2010-07-30T16:08:00.008-04:00

I've been delinquent in my blog this past week. Last weekend was my wife's annual family reunion, and thanks to the generosity of one of her brothers, we were able to attend.

Each year her great-grandfather's descendants gather in Manton, Michigan (off the 131 north of Cadillac, Michigan) for a few hours on a Saturday in July to catch up, eat, and spend money at the white elephant auction. This past weekend was the 29th reunion, but my lovely bride and I have only had the privilege of attending four of them.

Even though we were only gone a few days (we left Lexington at 5:30 pm on Thursday and were home again by 11:30 pm Sunday), the time away threw off some of my rhythms. Blogging regularly was one of those things that was easy to let slide. Reading my Bible prior to eating while on the trip was also something easily forgotten. It wasn't until sometime late Friday I realized I had not done my daily reading and yet had eaten breakfast with her brother and sister-in-law in Hastings, Michigan and grabbed lunch as we made the next leg of our journey north to Traverse City, Michigan where we would be staying at her uncle's house.

Fortunately, I have a lovely wife who desires to help me be better, and she read to me as we drove north that afternoon to help keep me on track. That became our daily ritual, each day as we were in the car making the journey to some destination, my bride would read to me from her Bible. I was able to remain connected to God through daily bible reading, and able to share some of my thoughts about the reading with my wife.

I am grateful my wife helped keep me on track and focused each day of vacation as it pertains to my commitment to read God's word. However, I am concerned at how easily I was able to forsake a practice I thought had become habit; a daily routine I had managed to maintain even while traveling for work. Somehow, going on vacation physically offered my spiritual routine a chance to also "check out."

As I sat at home this afternoon thinking about how easy it was for me to get off track last weekend, I received an email from a church I follow through the internet. Eastside Christian Church (www.eastside.com) is located in Fullerton, CA. In the past year, this church has experienced significant growth as a new pastor has come in and challenged the church to allow God to breath new life into their midst. The growth of the congregation, not simply in numbers, but in spiritual matters as well, has been a joy to watch.

As I read about the new series Gene Appel will be starting this weekend, Dangerous, I was reminded about Matthew 11:12: "And from the time John the Baptist began preaching until now, the Kingdom of Heaven has been forcefully advancing, and violent people are attacking it." (New Living Translation)

Listen to Gene's description of the Christian life he desires to live: "I want to be a more dangerous follower of Jesus. Jesus doesn't call us to a bland mediocre life of safety, but to a life of risk, adventure, and on-the-edge faith. I want to live with a more dangerous faith, pray more dangerous prayers, see Eastside be a more dangerous church, and take some new dangerous risks with those who are far from God."

Doesn't that sound similar to the passage in Matthew? Wouldn't living life as a more dangerous follower of Jesus be necessary to forcefully advance the Kingdom of Heaven?

Gene has just returned from his summer study break, and I have just returned from a very mini vacation with my family. Yet somehow, despite the differences in the length of our time away, we have both realized we must be intentional if we are going to make a difference for the cause of Christ. How we live each day, the decisions we make while in our normal routine or while on vacation, are important to the big picture.

I look forward to hearing the sermons online as they are posted. I can't wait to see how living dangerously for Jesus continues to change the Eastside family, and me.

Are you forcefully advancing? Maybe you've been on vacation too long. I invite you to join in our quest to live dangerously, forcefully advancing the Kingdom of God.

Inspiration Comes When Least Expected

2010-07-22T11:40:00.006-04:00

My family is leaving for Michigan later today to attend the Van Pelt Family Reunion just outside Traverse City, Michigan on Saturday. My father-in-law is the grandson of one of the Van Pelt daughters, hence our connection to the family.

As I was packing, doing laundry, cleaning out the car, and all those other things you do just prior to leaving town for an extended weekend, my youngest was watching the movie Chocolat. I was only able to catch parts of the movie, but immediately recognized this small French community was under the dictatorship of a very controlling man. To make matters worse, the man used as his mouthpiece the priest.

Each Sunday people were chastised by the homily. Using his strong influence over the priest, the mayor would provide significant input into the homily, using the pulpit to influence local policy. Every time an element the mayor did not wish to tolerate came into town (the woman who set up a chocolate shop, the "river people" who docked along the shore of the river), the mayor would influence the priest to describe how this new influence was evil. The influence was so significant, there is a scene where the priest includes a lecture against one of the groups during a funeral.

While I'd like to say this sort of spiritual control no longer happens, that as people have learned more about God's grace, they have become more Christ-like in their daily lives, it simply isn't true. You don't have to wait very long in some churches before you hear some form of "hate speech" (for lack of a better description). Even in a world where tolerance is expected, so often those who have received forgiveness for so much, offer forgiveness to so few.

Like this French village, we are so often caught up in outward appearance and miss the eternal. Unfortunately, this is not some new phenomenon that has risen out of the vanity of the modern age. The inability of people to see each other as God sees them has been around for a very long time. In 1 Samuel 16:7 (NIV) we read: "But the LORD said to Samuel, 'Do not consider his appearance or his height, for I have rejected him. The LORD does not look at the things man looks at. Man looks at the outward appearance, but the LORD looks at the heart.'"

Fortunately, the story takes a turn for the better. Near the end of the movie, redemption (and restoration) is achieved when the priest stands up on Easter Sunday and says:

"I'm not sure what the theme of my homily today ought to be. Do I want to speak of the miracle of our Lord's divine transformation? Not really, no. I don't want to talk about his divinity, I'd rather talk about his humanity. I mean, you know, how he lived his life here on earth. His kindness, his tolerance. Listen, here's what I think. I think we can't go around measuring our goodness by what we don't do, by what we deny ourselves, what we resist, and who we exclude. I think we've got to measure goodness by what we embrace, what we create, and who we include."

A few weeks back, I posted a blog about a group of people who did exactly that, they embraced Jesus' humanity. These men went to a gay pride parade with signs and shirts saying they were sorry, sorry for the way the church has treated the gay community. Through their humility, a bridge was built. These men understood the humanity of Jesus.

How are you living your life today? Are you living in a judgmental, intolerant, holier-than-thou manner, or are you striving to live each day of your life in a manner that honors the humanness of Jesus? I'm not talking about wearing a WWJD bracelet. I'm talking about digging deep into the scripture and learning for yourself just who Jesus was, what he did, and how you can emulate him. How can I ask myself "what would Jesus do" if I don't truly understand who Jesus was?

Take a good look at your life today and choose. Will I continue to live my life in the same narcissistic manner that has brought me this far or will I realize that only through connecting the least, the last, and the lost with the human face of Jesus will I also be "saved."

In Too Deep?

2010-07-20T16:32:00.004-04:00

As a result of the series we just completed at church, "If God Is Good ...," I began reading the book with the same title written by Randy Alcorn. Today I wanted to share some of the initial insights I have learned in the first few chapters.

As you might expect, the book has to deal with difficult situations. If you follow this blog, you know that in recent posts I've been writing about personal struggles my lovely bride and I have been enduring recently. Quite probably due to my current situation, the early pages of Mr. Alcorn's book seem to resonate deeply with my soul.

On page 12 he wrote: "If you base your faith on lack of affliction, your faith lives on the brink of extinction and will fall apart because of a frightening diagnosis or a shattering phone call. Token faith will not survive suffering, nor should it."

That kind of slaps you in the face, doesn't it? If your faith isn't tested, how can you know if it is real? Well, I have to say, having lived deep in the muck of life for the past who knows how long, I have to say my faith is real. Each day I wake up knowing there is a God, knowing he is in control, and knowing he has conquered death. My faith is real.

Turning to page 14 we read: "I never expected that a Christian who had access to God could feel so empty and alone." This describes someone who was crying out to God in the midst of their difficulties, and yet felt alone. It kind of sounds like Psalm 10:1, "Lord, why are you so far away? Why do you hide when there is trouble?" (New Century Version)

What about Psalm 44:23-24, NCV: "Wake up, Lord! Why are you sleeping? Get up! Don't reject us forever. Why do you hide from us? Have you forgotten our pain and troubles?"

What about when you are feeling like God has abandoned you, does that mean you are in too deep, that you've lost your faith? Habakkuk felt like he was. In Habakkuk 1:2-3 we read, "How long, O LORD, must I call for help, but you do not listen? Or cry out to you, "Violence!" but you do not save? Why do you make me look at injustice? Why do you tolerate wrong? Destruction and violence are before me; there is strife, and conflict abounds." (NIV)

I think the proof your faith is real is despite feeling abandoned, you still cry out to God. Why would I cry out to someone in whom I didn't have faith? If I'd lost my faith, wouldn't I start looking elsewhere for answers at the moment I truly felt abandoned? If I simply went back to the same god out of convenience, despite feeling neglected and alone, wouldn't that pretty much make me hopeless?

So, God shows me my faith is real by allowing bad things to enter my life. Sometimes, in the midst of those times, I feel abandoned. My response at that moment determines if my faith is real.

If my faith is proven true, then what? In Jeremiah 32:42 we read: "This is what the Lord says: Just as I have brought all these calamities on them, so I will do all the good I have promised them." (New Living Translation) God allowed calamities to enter our lives, but when we rise above them, showing our faith is true, we have his promises of good to look forward to as well.

Unfortunately, sometimes that good isn't realized in this world, but that is another blog post. I want to leave you with one final thought from Randy Alcorn's book. On page 38, having just described several situations where Christ followers had endured difficult situations, including death of loved ones, Randy says: "We need only read Scripture, look around us, or live long enough in order to learn that trusting God doesn't ward off all evil and suffering. He never said it would." (emphasis copied)

We will face trouble in this world. How we handle those times determines whether we are in too deep.

Tough Words to Hear

2010-07-19T08:17:00.002-04:00

Yesterday morning as I sat in church and listened to the final installment in the "If God is Good..." series, I was reminded of the old song, "He Never Promised Us a Rose Garden."

"God is far more interested in my character than He is interested in my comfort," Mike Breaux told us. He quoted James 1:2-4, which in the New Living Translation reads: "Dear brothers and sisters, when troubles come your way, consider it an opportunity for great joy. For you know that when your faith is tested, your endurance has a chance to grow. So let it grow, for when your endurance is fully developed, you will be perfect and complete, needing nothing."

How's that for encouragement from the brother of Jesus and my pastor? You want your faith to be stronger? Well, then you need to be tested!

Looking back over the past few years, I'm guessing my lovely bride and I have some pretty beefy faith "muscles." We've endured much in these past few years. While I don't know why, like I recently said in my "Mountain of God" post, I certainly hope the glories of the mountain far outweigh the pain and suffering we currently endure!

Mike further said, "Suffering cultivates humility and draws us into closer relationship with God." Look at Ephesians 3:16-19: "I pray that from his glorious, unlimited resources he will empower you with inner strength through his Spirit. Then Christ will make his home in your hearts as you trust in him. Your roots will grow down into God’s love and keep you strong. And may you have the power to understand, as all God’s people should, how wide, how long, how high, and how deep his love is. May you experience the love of Christ, though it is too great to understand fully. Then you will be made complete with all the fullness of life and power that comes from God." (NLT)

Isn't that just like the Christian experience? We want to be close to God, so He allows suffering and turmoil to come into our lives. We want to have a stronger understanding of love, so God introduces us to the move unlovable, difficult people known to man. We pray for patience and God sends trials and tribulations. Everything is opposite in God's economy. However, in case you think you can outsmart God and pray for poverty so He will send you wealth, we were reminded yesterday about God's economy as well.

The story goes a man was talking to God one day and said, "God, is it true that to you a minute is like a thousand years, and a thousand years is like a minute?"

"Yes," God responded.

"And so I would imagine," the man continued, "a penny is like a million dollars and a million dollars is like a penny."

"Yes," God replied.

"Well," then asked the man, "God, can I have one of your pennies?"

"In a minute," God said.

Hebrews 13:5 tells us: "Don’t love money. Be happy with what you have because God has said, “I will never abandon you or leave you." (God's Word Translation)

We cannot understand in this life the whys to many of the issues we face. Mike showed us yesterday that suffering prepares us for eternity and the suffering and hardships of this world are but temporary nuisances. II Corinthians 4:17-18 reads: "For our present troubles are small and won’t last very long. Yet they produce for us a glory that vastly outweighs them and will last forever! So we don’t look at the troubles we can see now; rather, we fix our gaze on things that cannot be seen. For the things we see now will soon be gone, but the things we cannot see will last forever." (NLT)

Do I enjoy hearing suffering is part of this world, and through suffering we are given the opportunity to draw closer to God? Do I enjoy knowing that each day I may have to endure more, not knowing the end game, other than heaven awaits? Do I find comfort knowing I am not alone in my suffering, it is common to all mankind?

Of course not! I need to believe that C.S. Lewis truly understood when he said, "That is what mortals misunderstand. They say of some temporal suffering, 'No future bliss can make up for it,' not knowing that Heaven, once attained, will work backwards and turn even that agony into a glory."

Take heart, my friends; as bad as your suffering now seems, Heaven awaits! Whatever things we endure on this earth, we have God's promise that He will never leave us (Hebrews 13:5b, above) and in the end, we will live with Him eternally.

Is that enough hope while I'm stuck in the middle of turmoil? I don't know. All I can do is continue to move forward, one day at a time, and hold on to Jesus.

"Jesus loves me, this I know, for the Bible tells me so." Simple words, and yet so powerful! Even in the depths of your darkest despair, hold on to Jesus, hold on to His truth, hold on to His love!

The Mountain of God

2010-07-17T09:39:00.003-04:00

My wife asked me the other night what book of the Bible I am reading now, and I told her I had just started the book of Judges.

"Oh, what a tough book," she replied.

"Why?" I asked.

"Because it is the same thing over and over again. The people turn away from God, they are oppressed, a new judge is raised up, they overcome their enemies, and then live in peace for a while," was her response.

"Well, you missed a step," I said. "Someone has to cry out to God and repent before He raises up a deliver."

It is a very simplistic overview of the book, but basically that is what happens. It kind of reminds me of the song "Mountain of God" by Third Day.

I thought that I was all alone, broken and afraid, but you were there with me, you were there with me. And I didn't even know I had lost my way, but you were there with me, yes, you were there with me. Tell you opened up my eyes I never knew, that I couldn't ever make it without you.

Chorus:
Even though the journey's long, and I know the road is hard. Well the one who's gone before me, He will help me carry on. And after all that I've been through, now I realize the truth that I must go through the valley to stand upon the Mountain of God.

As I travel on the road, you have led me down, you are here with me, yes, you are here with me. And I have need for nothing more, oh, now that I have found that you are here with me, yes, you are here with me. I confess from time to time I lose my way, but you were always there to bring me back again.

~chorus~

Bridge:
Sometimes I think of where it is I've come from, and the things I've left behind. Well, of all I've had, what I posess, they can't quite compare, with what's in front of me, with what's in front of me.

Even though the journey's long, and I know the road is hard, well, the one who's gone before me, He will help me carry on. And after all that I've been through, now I realize the truth that I must go through the valley, to stand upon the mountain. . . well, I must go through the valley, to stand upon the mountain. . . yes, I must go through the valley, to stand upon the mountain of God.

I thought that I was all alone, broken and afraid, but you are here with me, you are here with me.

Just like the Israelite nation of old, we live in a cycle, and the succession from highs to lows often affects our view of God. Right now, my lovely bride and I are in a valley. We have been living in this valley for a very, very long time. I can only hope that when we finally reach the Mountain of God it will far outshine the pain, agony, and turmoil we are currently enduring. Right now, where we are standing, I don't see how anything can supplant this misery; but I have to hold on to the truth "God is faithful."

Why are we in this valley? Why, despite striving each day to live for God, to serve God, and to honor God do we face financial, emotional, and spiritual conflict? I don't know. Yet for some reason God needs us to endure this time, for a season, so we can be ready for the next great thing to which He has called us.

Whether you are in a valley or have finally reached the Mountain of God, remember, God is there with you, He is there with you!

For What Are You Training?

2010-07-14T11:03:00.003-04:00

If you read my blog from yesterday, you know I have once again started running, training for an upcoming 5k here in Lexington, Kentucky. For 26 years, people have been lining up in downtown Lexington to be part of this run, which generally starts in the late evening, hopefully making it slightly cooler during race time.

My lovely bride participated in the run a few years ago, but I have not done any running in our nearly 9 years in Lexington. As I mentioned yesterday, my impetus for taking up running again was the Lexington Leadership Foundation's (www.lexlf.org) Team LLF (www.teamllf.com), which recently completed their first race on July 3, 2010.

As I was out training again this morning, my mind wandered to the goal of Team LLF; to mobilize the body of Christ in an effort to increase our level of faith and fitness. This got my mind thinking about the times the Apostle Paul used sports metaphors when referencing the spiritual journey.

I Corinthians 9:24-27 (God's Word Translation) Don’t you realize that everyone who runs in a race runs to win, but only one runner gets the prize? Run like them, so that you can win. Everyone who enters an athletic contest goes into strict training. They do it to win a temporary crown, but we do it to win one that will be permanent. So I run—but not without a clear goal ahead of me. So I box—but not as if I were just shadow boxing. Rather, I toughen my body with punches and make it my slave so that I will not be disqualified after I have spread the Good News to others.

It is only when we are disciplined that we will find success. If I want to complete the 5k this August, or had I been part of the recent 10k on July 3rd, I would need to be in training. To achieve success, I need to train. While training, I need to have goals.

Paul also talked about setting goals and how they relate to the Christian experience.

Philippians 3:10-14 (New Century Version) I want to know Christ and the power that raised him from the dead. I want to share in his sufferings and become like him in his death. Then I have hope that I myself will be raised from the dead. I do not mean that I am already as God wants me to be. I have not yet reached that goal, but I continue trying to reach it and to make it mine. Christ wants me to do that, which is the reason he made me his. Brothers and sisters, I know that I have not yet reached that goal, but there is one thing I always do. Forgetting the past and straining toward what is ahead, I keep trying to reach the goal and get the prize for which God called me through Christ to the life above.

If I want to know Christ and the power that raised him from the dead, I need to daily set my goals and then strain to achieve those goals. Just as I now have a goal of being ready for the 5k on August 14, 2010, I need to also have a spiritual goal. Will daily Bible reading and prayer help me better understand Christ and the power that raised him from the dead? It will help, but there should be more. Not only should I read and pray, I must then enact what I have learned in my daily life.

Just like simply getting up and running each morning is a good form of exercise, if I don't ever enter a race, I simply have a healthy body. How many Christians are walking around today with a terrific understanding of the Bible, having read it each day, but have yet to put it into practice? They are like athletes who only train and never compete. I believe that when you understand that training is good, but it is only when you have set a goal and then put everything into achieving that goal, putting all of your training into practice, that you achieve personal satisfaction. Sometimes, you also receive a prize!

How are you doing? Are you training with no intent of ever getting into competition? Are you reading your Bible, praying, and simply staying on the sidelines? What is keeping you from stepping into action? God loves spending time with us, but that time should compel us to become more Christ-like, and that means that we have to get dirty. Jesus touched the leapers, he lived with the poor and needy, and he ate with tax collectors. In doing so, Jesus changed the world.

The same power that raised Jesus from the dead is available to us today, we simply have to train and then put ourselves in the place God sends us. The power is His to give or deny. It is up to us to be sure to be ready when the time comes.

In Training

2010-07-13T10:04:00.005-04:00

My friends at the Lexington Leadership Foundation (www.lexlf.org) started a new running group a few months ago in preparation for a 10K run recently held in Lexington. While both my wife and I are former runners (we have both taken time off, me much more time off than my lovely bride), we chose not to become part of the group when it formed in April.

However, due to our friendship with the President/CEO of the LLF, we were invited to the spaghetti dinner held for the team the night prior to the July 3rd 10K run. It was a pleasure to be there to support the 30+ men, women, and children who would either participate in the 10K or in the 1 Mile Fun Run the following morning. Most enjoyable, however, was the Christian fellowship over a free meal (free to me at least, someone paid for the food) and the pep talks by both a Lexington City Council Member who has become the voice of fitness here in our community and the coach of the UK Women's Basketball team; both Christians.

The evening was so motivating, I told Kelly I felt we could be ready for the next event in which Team LLF would participate, the Mid-summer Night's Run, a 5K event in mid August. Kelly asked me the next day if I was serious about running in the Mid-summer Night's Run, and asked again a few days later, probably because I had yet to start training, and each time I said, yes. So this past Saturday and again this morning, my lovely bride was out training.

I followed suit this morning, and for the first time in over 20 years, I was running. Well, I ran, walked, ran, walked, ran, and walked (in that order) a mile this morning in just under 14 minutes. Now before you get too excited for me, my pace this morning was approximately that of a forced march in the Army, and they are carrying their full packs during their march. Also, when I used to run (now running isn't something I've done significantly since injuring a knee my junior year in school), "back in the day," my slowest times were 8 minute miles. While I'm happy I didn't die this morning, 14 minutes is significantly off my former pace. Of course, I've also added an entire person to my body, now weighing almost 90 pounds more than I did while running competitively ...

So after running this morning, I returned home, picked up my Bible and began my daily devotions. In early May I was challenged by my pastor to make Bible reading and prayer a priority each day, no matter what. Following the example of that pastor, I committed not to eat each day until after I had spent time with God.

Like running, time with God had become something I found easy to ignore, neglect, or simply not do. And like my body had gained extra weight due to the lack of exercise, decreasing my health; not spending time with God had also put me in a place where I was increasing my potential for worsening spiritual health.

Fortunately, making the commitment to be with God daily before food, something I've only missed twice in nearly 2-1/2 months, was an easy routine to develop. It is my hope that the care I've begun to take in my spiritual life (which has also brought forth more blogging), will show me that having put my mind to something, especially when it is God honoring, I can do it!

I look forward to seeing how running will improve my health and my life, just like my daily routine with God has shown positive changes in these past few months.

Where are you "sitting on the fence" in regards to a life change you've contemplated, but not yet implemented? What motivation will be required for you to take the plunge? Who in your life will you choose to hold you accountable? I urge you, follow God's prompting, you will not regret your decision!

What is "Good"?

2010-07-12T09:36:00.004-04:00

Yesterday was week two of the current series at church, "If God is Good..." and the question was raised, what is good? Until we understand how God defines good, how can we determine whether or not He is good?

Many Christians, and even non-Christians, I imagine, know Romans 8:28: "And we know that in all things God works for the GOOD of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose." (NIV, emphasis mine)

I know man's definition of good and that is how many of us have interpreted this verse. Merriam-Webster defines good as "advancement of prosperity or well being." Isn't that what we are seeking each time we quote Romans 8:28? Don't we use this verse as a promise that God will turn this despair into good somehow? In saying that, don't we mean God will miraculously make this tragic situation somehow advance my prosperity or well being?

But if we live our lives quoting this verse, looking for the good God has promised to work, shouldn't we understand His definition of good? Fortunately, we don't have to wait very long in the book of Romans to find out how God defines good. Simply looking at Romans 8:29 provides the answer: "For God knew his people in advance, and he chose them to BECOME LIKE HIS SON, so that his Son would be the firstborn among many brothers and sisters." (NLT, emphasis mine)

You want to understand God's definition of good? You simply need to become more like Jesus. OK, how do I do that? I would imagine you make your priorities the same as Jesus' priorities. I would imagine you labor for the least of these, you daily spend time in prayer to seek God's will, and you never, ever do anything "unless I do what the Father does" (John 10:37). It is only through becoming more like Jesus that God's good will have been worked in our lives.

How are you doing in regards to becoming the good God desires to work in you? Are you becoming more Christ-like each day? Are your pursuits the same as Jesus'? Or has the glitter of the present world pulled you off track?

Commit today to become more Christ-like each day so you might grow into the good to which God has promised!

Better than a Hallelujah

2010-07-10T15:46:00.005-04:00

Have you heard Amy Grant's newest single, "Better than a Hallelujah?" It is an amazing song that focuses on God enjoying truthful emotions from His children (a mother's tears, a drunkard's cry, the honest cries of breaking hearts) more than He enjoys hearing "Hallelujah" emanate from our lips.

I believe this song has a biblical foundation. Looking at Hosea 6:6 in the New Century Version we read, "I want faithful love more than I want animal sacrifices. I want people to know me more than I want burnt offerings."

God wants us to truly know Him, to be honest with Him as we approach His throne, either in prayer or in offering praise. It is only when we are honest with God that we have also become honest with ourselves. It is only through completely emptying ourselves that we are then able to allow God to fill us.

God is a strange phenomenon when you think about it. He created everything, and by Him are all things made (John 1:3), and yet He does not force Himself upon us. Unless we open ourselves up, God will not come into our life. Unless we freely accept His offer of forgiveness, God cannot change our lives. It is only when we are truly open, truly vulnerable before God that His miracle can happen.

Maybe that is why Amy's new song is so meaningful to me right now, and maybe that is why it was so important to her to record after hearing the song recently. Through this song, understanding that being real with God is more important to Him than saying "Hallelujah;" maybe, just maybe we will be able to find the healing only God can offer.

Are you open to God or are you simply singing hallelujah?

Knowing vs. Not Knowing

2010-07-09T12:34:00.005-04:00

I was watching a video this afternoon of a new show on cable. The show follows the daily life of a comedian. The show focuses on struggles he faces in daily life and has a few of his stand up segments spliced in as "color" for the day-to-day activities.

One segment of the stand up routine troubled me. It was discouraging because the star was turning his greed into comedy. I realize that in our calloused world, laughing at American greed has become commonplace, however this few seconds of the routine showed me just how far we have come.

The comedian was talking about how his driving a luxury car actually hurts other people in third world countries. He said he realizes he could trade his used luxury car in on a brand new subcompact and get cash back because of the difference in value. He said he could then use that cash to feed hungry people in third world countries. The entire time he is doing the bit, the audience is laughing.

Now please don't hear be judging people who drive luxury cars. I too have had the privilege of owning luxury cars. My first car was a Cadillac Coupe de Ville. Since that car I have owned a Volvo 940 and a Lexus GS300, both entry level luxury cars.

My problem isn't with owning the car; my problem is with having come to the conclusion he could help others but instead turns the situation into a punchline for his stand up routine.

That leads me to my point for today. I believe it is one thing to not understand the problem, it is completely different to know there is a problem, have a solution, and then ignore your conscience, or worse, turn the situation into a punchline.

I recently saw a movie (yes, I do have a life outside of movies, but right now they are making my point for me) where an international aide worker commented his biggest problem was not that people in Uganda were starving to death. His biggest problem was to inform people with money there are people in Uganda starving to death when those potential donors don't even know there are people in Uganda.

It seems to me that as small as the world has become, as intertwined as the global economy has made us, there are still those of us who don't realize there is a Uganda and there are people who live there we could help.

I like my things. I've worked hard to attain them. I did not receive a large inheritance. I am not from a famous family. I have worked hard my entire life to be able to earn my things. I am grateful to God I was born in America, where I have the opportunity to work hard and raise myself up financially, as opposed to some other nation where I would not have the same opportunities.

Yet now that I know there are people starving each day, now that I know I can help, now what?

Does owning a luxury car, being on television, and having more than many people make our comedian a bad person? No! Having knowledge he could make a difference in another part of the world and turning that knowledge into a punchline, that is the problem.

If you are a Christian, God has called you to serve the "least of these." I believe our legacy as Christians needs to be about the entire world (Jerusalem, Judea, Samaria, and the ends of the earth). What conviction or realization have you seen in your life and have simply turned it into a punchline by ignoring your conscience?

A Still, Small Voice

2010-07-07T09:23:00.009-04:00

Last night as I was praying while preparing to go to sleep, I was deeply troubled. The same old things were on my mind: no job, no income, past due bills; so I took them to God. In my usual manner, I told God of the issue of concern and then prayed scripture appropriate to the request. "My God will meet all your needs according to his glorious riches in Christ Jesus." (Philippians 4:19-NIV). I also prayed Matthew 6:25-34 where Jesus, in the Sermon on the Mount, tells those listening they are more important than the birds and flowers so don't worry about food or clothing.

I poured out my soul last night, telling God it had become cumbersome praying the same prayer each day, living each day with the weight of my financial burdens. And during that agonizing time, I heard a "still, small voice" whisper, "You've already given these concerns to me, why do you continue to hold on to them so tightly? Leave your burdens at the throne and I will then be able to answer."

In an amazing scene, something similar to Christian in Pilgrim's Progress losing the heavy pack from his back, I felt a weight fall off me last night. I realized I had continued to hold on to my requests each day by carrying around the weight of the problem despite having offered it to God in prayer. Each night I had prayed for relief, and then each morning I grabbed right back on to the problem, trying to solve it in my own power.

Last night I realized, though unfortunately not for the first time in my spiritual journey, that simply praying does not provide God with what He needs to be able to answer our prayers. In addition to offering the prayer, we have to also leave the burden at the throne. It is only when we truly surrender our daily problems to God that He will be able to provide answers.

I wish I could say that when I woke up this morning I had several emails from people wanting to provide me with job opportunities. Unfortunately, that is not how God chose to work this time. I can say, that in addition to hearing the voice tell me to leave the burden at the throne, I also clearly heard that the answer will come in His time. What is His time? I'm not sure.

I have learned one thing, however in the past five years of being self-employed. While God is rarely early (with answers to prayers), He has never been late. Sure, He operates outside of my personal comfort zone, but in five years, we have always had the money in the bank account on the day it was needed. Would I have liked for it to have been there sooner? Certainly! Have I had to negotiate with companies due to late payments? Yes. Yet each time "our backs seemed against the wall," the funds we had earned would arrive or a job would be offered, providing just enough to cover our immediate need.

You would think that having lived this way for five years I could simply wake each morning with the understanding that God is in control. Unfortunately I do not. There are far too many days, like last night, where I'm holding on to the burden and keeping God from working another miracle in my life. Last night was a great reminder that God cares for us, He has our best intentions in mind, and He will provide; as long as we stop trying to do it on our own and place ourselves in a position to respond to His prompting, in His time.

What are you holding on to today that you thought you had already released to God? Open up to Him completely and let God work His miracle in your life, in His time.

Just Rambling about Worship

2010-07-06T21:13:00.003-04:00

I drove from Lexington, Kentucky to Freeport, Illinois today. It wasn't an interesting drive since this is the fourth time I've driven to Chicago in the past two months. I practically have the route memorized, and can track my route with a clock rather than with a speedometer or odometer.

So I spent the time listening to several of my Pandora mixes, starting with my Avalon mix and then moving on to my Casting Crowns mix. I always find it more enjoyable to travel with music, and today I was in the mood for some worship sets.

It never ceases to amaze me how music can change any mood, and sure enough, at the points when I was getting "road weary" a great live worship set would come on the mix. Live worship is always best in my opinion, especially when the crowd gets into the act. I simply love hearing an artist drop out and let the crowd sing the lyrics. In that moment, there is a special bond between the musician and the audience.

It is like that with God too, I believe. When God hears us sing back to him (or use whatever form of worship we prefer), there is a tremendous bond created. God so desires worship from His creation, Luke 19:40 tells us that if his people keep silent, the rocks will cry out. God wants us to worship Him. He desires our praise and that connection with us, His children.

I hope that you find time in your day, each and every day, to worship. Not only does God desire to connect with us, we need to connect with Him!

Two Truths from the Cross

2010-07-04T13:06:00.003-04:00

This morning at church I heard the most convincing argument God exists and is a good and powerful God ever. I've been a Christian my whole life. I was raised in a Christian home, my father a Baptist preacher, my mother a devoted pastor's wife. It was my mother who showed me the path of salvation at our dinner table when I was four years old. My father baptized me when I was seven at the church where he was the pastor in southeastern Michigan.

The past 10 years of my life I've been part of the Willow Creek, non-denominational, "seeker-friendly" church. I would venture that in those 10 years, I've heard the "Why Do Bad Things Happen?" and "How Can God Call Himself Good?" type messages at least once a year. So walking into church this morning, seeing the new sermon series was "If God is Good...," I truly had no expectation to be surprised.

However, as with many things in my life these days, I was blown away. The message started the same, someone who had experienced all the hurts life had to offer (losing a brother to childhood leukemia, a mother who became an alcoholic and then later committed suicide, a father who sexually abused her as a teen) sat with her own daughter after her college sweetheart had walked out on them and asked hard questions of God.

I expected the answers to be the same, but this time, rather than being told that God created a perfect world but in order for man to have free will, He also had to allow for it to be corrupted; we were taken to the cross.

Do you question if God is in control? Do you question if God is a good and just God? Then all you have to do is look to the cross. This morning I was shown the answer to every question about the goodness of God can be handled at the cross. From this day on, each time I am asked by someone about God's goodness, I will have an answer. My hope is that after reading this, you will as well.

Please understand, this is not an answer I found. The work was done by someone else. I am simply forwarding this truth in the hopes that it may touch your life in the remarkable manner in which it touched me this morning as I listened to Mike Breaux at Southland. The thoughts were his, but the truth resonated in me like never before.

Mike took us to the cross and showed us two truths from the cross that answer the "If God is Good..." question:

1. We live in a toxic, unfair world and noone is exempt, not even God.
2. We have a sacrificial God.

The first truth blew me away. Like many of you, I have heard the message of the cross, heard of the sacrifice Jesus paid so we may have forgiveness of sin. It wasn't until this morning, however, I actually saw the connection between the fallen world and the price God allowed His son to pay in order to restore the world.

If anyone had an argument they deserved nothing but good, it was Jesus. His entire public ministry was devoted to sacrificially giving to those who had nothing. He fed people, he healed people, he changed people's lives for the better. In his entire ministry, the only people who were ever hurt were those in power, those who had corrupted the religious system. If anyone had an argument they were unjustly punished, it was Jesus.

Yet scripture tells us in Isaiah 53:7 that he did not open his mouth in defense. Jesus willingly (see John 10:17-18) offered himself as our sacrifice.

Yes bad things happen to good people, and good things happen to really bad people; but even God himself was not exempt from the laws of this world, proving to me He is good. Rather than remove himself (see Matthew 26:47-55), Jesus willingly offered his life for mine. That is the most compelling argument for a good God I can offer. Fortunately, we also serve a powerful God and Jesus is not dead; he was raised three days later.

I hope this brief post has offered you something to consider. If you want to hear Mike's words, follow this link (http://www.southlandchristian.org/teaching/series/if-god-is-good/). The messages will be posted as they are completed.

Next time you wonder, or someone asks "Is God Good?" all you have to do is look to the cross.

Happy Birthday America

2010-07-03T09:16:00.003-04:00

This weekend America celebrates 234 years since the signing of the Declaration of Independence.

Compared to other nations of the world, America is more like a teenager. I was watching a movie recently where US armed forces needed to enter a tunnel beneath a museum in Eastern Europe. The museum curator told the general, "I don't care who you are, this museum is older than your country and you will not dig a hole in the middle of it!"

That got me thinking and as I was contemplating what to write in honor of my country's birth, it became apparent I should concentrate on her age. Through that lens, I believe many of the problems we face as a nation today can be explained. So please permit me this deviation from my usual format (writing about the spiritual walk) as I delve into politics for just a bit today.

As an infant and then young nation, America, like children, followed without hesitation the teachings of our parents (the founding fathers). The bible and prayer were permitted in schools, we sought God during major times of crisis, and despite what our most recent President declared in 2009, America was a nation based on Jude0-Christian principles.

But then, like humans, as America entered her prepubescent years around the turn of the 20th Century, she started to shun the teachings of her fathers and seek her own path. Like many preteens, America turned to her peer group for identity and took on many of the teachings of Europe; including removing the Bible and prayer from school and replacing it with humanistic and evolutionary teachings.

As a full-fledged teen, by the end of the 20th century and now into the first decade of the 21st century, America has completely immersed herself in the identity of her peer group; taking on the very socialist, high tax, big government identity our fore fathers fought to gain independence from 234 years ago.

It is my hope, that like humans, as America continues to mature and reaches her "mid 20's," she will realize the founding fathers were men of wisdom and return to their teachings, shoving off this false identity she has taken in her rebellious years. You've heard it said that as children we think our parents are the smartest, strongest people on earth. As teens and young adults we think our parents are the weakest and dumbest people on earth; and sometime after graduating college and perhaps starting our own family, we realize just how smart and strong our parents actually are.

It is my hope America continues to mature and in doing so realizes just how smart the founding fathers were and returns to her roots; roots that include God and true freedom for all.

Happy birthday America. Long may your flag of freedom wave!

My Friday Morning Prayer

2010-07-02T11:29:00.003-04:00

I had a heavy heart this morning as I approached my bible reading and prayer time; there are simply too many things weighing on my mind, and it was reflected in my approach to quiet time. Yet, because I have committed to spending time with God each day prior to eating, I knew that despite my lack of desire, I at least needed to honor my pledge. So I picked up my bible and read II Corinthians 3.

Paul's argument that through the Holy Spirit, there is freedom was just what I needed to hear. I closed my bible and began to freely pour out my troubles to God. I openly listed each issue that was weighing so heavily on my heart, asking God for a miracle in that area of my life.

Beyond the current financial strains, the relationship issues, the fear of the future (as it pertains to ensuring I can provide for my family while pursuing my dream); I was also somewhat concerned about what to write today. Earlier in the week I had heard God tell me I needed to get back to writing regularly, and took that to mean I should blog daily as well as read His word and pray. So during my prayer time this morning I was also asking God what I should write.

The amazing thing was I could "hear" God talking back to me. There was a point as I prayed that I realized I was doing a lot of talking and very little listening. At that moment, I sensed it was a message from God and in my prayer said, "OK God, I want to listen," and I stopped praying and began to listen.

In that moment, old gospel hymns began to fill my mind. The first was the song "I'd Rather Have Jesus" and then I continued to hear song after song about Jesus. "Jesus Saves" was followed by "Jesus Loves Me" and then "Jesus, Jesus, Jesus." The message was clear; focus on Jesus, and the everything else will no longer be as significant.

For a moment I had peace and thanked God for His message to me. And then a miracle happened; I fell asleep. This is a miracle because I have not been sleeping well the past several weeks. I sleep an hour, am awake a few hours, and then sleep an hour again. I repeat this pattern each night until my lovely bride wakes up to go to work. It was a pattern I had repeated again last night. So this morning, at 8:30 am, after reading II Corinthians 3 and praying for a few minutes, God interrupted me, gave me a great message that the priority in my life should be His son, and then gave me rest.

Are you listening when God speaks in your life? What message has He given you and what are you doing with that message?

Two Different Approaches

2010-07-01T09:26:00.002-04:00

Yesterday I became aware of two different approaches to treating people by Christians that I simply could not pass up the opportunity to share here today. It all started during my prayer time yesterday morning. During my quiet time with God, I sensed Him telling me I needed to return to my writing.

So I wrote my first blog of 2010, on June 30th, exactly half way into the year. And then I began a quest to read other writers, to peruse other blogs, to see what the world was discussing. I found the first of what I'm calling "Two Different Approaches" through a link on Twitter. A friend on Twitter had linked to the following website: http://naytinalbert.blogspot.com/2010/06/i-hugged-man-in-his-underwear-and-i-am.html. It was a story about some Christians who wore "I'm Sorry" t-shirts to a gay pride parade in Chicago. Along with the t-shirts, they carried hand written signs apologizing to the gay community for the way churches and Christians have showered the gay community with hate. The resulting healing that was started was amazing. I recommend each of you read the blog entry and then consider how you can find ways to also begin the process of reconciliation in your community.

I immediately sent the link to my lovely bride because I was so moved by the power of this simply act. Yes, it cost little financially, but it offered so much spiritually and emotionally; both to those who needed to hear the message of love Jesus truly offers, and to those who were offering the "olive branch." I am motivated to be a better Christ follower when I read stories like this; stories of true Christianity in action.

Later in the day, as my bride and I were sitting on our back porch, eating ice cream, talking, and looking at fireflies and stars, I heard the story of the second approach; unfortunately the all too common approach. A nationally syndicated radio host was responding to an email.

Now I cannot truly confirm this host is a Christian. While reading through the website this morning I found a section dedicated to providing the company's solutions to churches, and the corporate mission statement says: "... providing biblically based, common-sense education and empowerment which gives HOPE to everyone ...." However, I could not find sufficient definitive proof on the website to truly say the host himself is a committed Christ follower.

Yet, because churches across the county use the system developed by this company, because many of the principles included in the process are truly bibically based, my wife (and many others I would assume) believe this host is a Christian. So as she was listening to his response to an email while driving to the store to pick up the ice cream we were about to enjoy on the back porch last night (and yes, we had a coupon for the ice cream) she became offended by his response. The question was from a woman who did not agree with her husband's financial choice and she wanted some help.

The response, however was where it all broke down. My wife said the host started mocking the husband, calling him a "loser" in a patronizing tone of voice. He didn't stop there, he continued by saying when you told you father you were going to marry this guy, the sigh you heard escape from his lips was your father calling him a "loser." The host continued to say "loser" still using a condescending tone in his voice as he said the word, repeating it four or more times before my wife turned her radio off, unable to listen to another word.

Again, I cannot confirm this host is a committed Christ follower. I do not listen enough to know his heart. But I do know his response last night, at least the portion my wife heard and relayed to me, was not in concert with a response Jesus would have made. This man's response last night was not uplifting, did not provide the wife, who was seeking help, with hope or ammunition for a strong debate with her husband. The response did not provide the wife with a means of honoring her husband, while also striving to help him grow in his understanding of financial responsibility.

Please do not hear me judging the radio show host with my words. To judge him would be a failure to follow Jesus' example and an act against my own writing. My intention as I wrote today was to offer a challenge; a challenge supported by the offering of "Two Different Approaches."

Do you call yourself a Christ follower? If so, how do your actions reflect Christ. As you touch people throughout your day, consider carefully how that interaction reflects the message of Jesus. Commit today to leave each encounter with the knowledge you have impacted your world positively for the gospel. That is how we carry the message of Jesus to a world in need.

Where I Am Right Now

2010-06-30T12:54:00.003-04:00

It amazes me how quickly time flies for me now. Just yesterday I was mowing part of the back lawn, our back lawn is divided into four distinct areas and I was mowing one of the four, when it hit me an entire week had passed since I has last mowed. Here I am mowing the second of four areas, and it had been a week since I'd started mowing the first of the four areas. Somehow, between mowing the first and second portion of the back yard, a week had passed.

That is just where I am living right now. Time is simply flying by, and I have no idea why it has changed. One thing I do know, I'm going to wake up one day and wonder where it all went.

I've recently left the church I spent the last year building, literally, because I no longer felt effective in the ministry to which they called me. After much prayer and deliberate conversations with my lovely bride, it became apparent that leaving was what we believed God was leading me to do. It was not an easy decision, I prayed and struggled for nearly two months, but time after time, the direction seemed to be, "Your work here is finished."

This move freed me up to start working on me again, something I'd left behind during the past year. I now make sure I feed my spiritual needs, read my Bible and pray, each day PRIOR to feeding my physical needs; food. This is a departure for me, helping me realize that it all truly does come from God.

But despite taking the time each day with God, I still feel like I'm stuck on a treadmill. I recently finished Don Miller's latest book, "A Million Miles in a Thousand Years," and through him learned life is a story and we have the power to control the scenes. Yet I still feel like life is flying and I'm simply marking time. Even my daily time with God, a new practice only missed twice in the past eight weeks, has not truly moved me to a place where I feel I'm making a significant navigational change to my "story."

So I find myself more frequently in moments like yesterday with the lawn mower, wondering how an entire week managed to squeeze itself between my mowing two portions of my own back yard.

I'll continue to wake up each day and spend time with God, both in His word and in prayer, prior to putting food in my mouth. This is one habit I can pursue that will lead to a better story in my life, even if I feel that time is moving so quickly I simply can't keep up the pace.

What new habits are you developing to help change the direction of your story?

A Gentle Reminder

2009-12-30T09:46:00.002-05:00

I have spent the previous five days fighting a migraine. It came on at full force at approximately 2 pm on Christmas day. I managed to spend Christmas morning with the family, doing our normal Christmas routine (stockings first thing, breakfast, and then the presents) ... We even played some games together, listened to some new CDs, and enjoyed the morning.

But then, inexplicably, I was hit with the beginnings of a terrible migraine. Immediately, I went to the medicine cabinet and downed a few pills. It was my hope the early medication would minimize the event, making it possible to enjoy Christmas dinner with the family.

But by 2:30 I was flat on my back in bed with a wet cloth covering my eyes. I lay there until Saturday morning, eating Christmas dinner in bed.

Saturday, the pain continued and because the details of the individual days are not important, I'll fast-forward to day five; the pain was still there on Tuesday morning. I had missed work on Sunday, I had been in bed with a wet cloth on my head far too long, I had watched far too many videos (finding the diversion helped me focus beyond the pain). Most importantly, I had filled my body with pills (something I've walked away from in recent years) because of the pain.

It wasn't until late Tuesday morning, after reading an email from a life group member, that healing began. In that email, Eric asked me had I taken my migraine to God? Yes I was taking medication, yes I was making plans to visit my chiropractor, yes I was dulling the pain with videos; but had I invited God's healing for my pain?

This hit me with great conviction. Why do we (and by we, I mean me) so quickly reach for modern medicine, push drugs and other 'healing' substances in our bodies, and yet forsake the Great Physician, the Great Creator, our Father when we are sick or hurting, or in need?

So with prompting from my friend, and a humbled heart at my own personal arrogance, I went to my Heavenly Father asking for His healing. Within a very short time, I felt less pain, was able to focus for the first time in days, and didn't feel that hopelessness that had overwhelmed me the previous five days.

So it is my prayer this gentle reminder helps you. I'm not sure what you are facing right now. I'm not sure what 'earthly' solutions you are using to mitigate your suffering. But if you have not sought God to be with you in this, stop and ask. He is waiting for your invitation.

I can't promise that you will see immediate healing as I did. I can promise that God wants to be with you, wants to comfort you, and wants community with you; all of which are good.

The Shepherds

2009-12-20T18:14:00.002-05:00

Our church has been in a series called "How to Steal Christmas." It is about the ways our actions steal the true meaning of Christmas. Week one was "Give in to Greed." Through a 'greed based' outlook at Christmas (I want, I want, I want or worse I need, I need, I need), we miss the truth of this marvelous season. Week two was "Unwrap Unbelief" which focused on our tendency, especially in America, to simply not seek actual truth, but to settle for what society calls truth, or worse simply do nothing to pursue what our heart so desperately seeks.

Today we learned so many "Waste the Wonder." The pastor asked, "Have we allowed this story to become so familiar, we waste the wonder?" Or have we become so focused on our 'to do list' that we simply don't have time to revel in the wonder that God became man simply to save us.

Enter the shepherds. As you read the story in Luke 2, you learn a heavenly host came to the shepherds and told them of the birth of Christ in neighboring Bethlehem. And what was the shepherds response? They LEFT THEIR SHEEP to go find this baby.

Now I wonder how often you've been like me and read the story and never marveled at this simple act. Shepherds would defend their sheep, even to death if necessary. They certainly would not leave them in the fields. This announcement had to be something that was so important to them, their primary focus would shift.

Which is exactly what happened. Because even after going to meet the messiah, the shepherds did not immediately return to their herds, they continued to neglect their charges in order to spread the word of Jesus' birth. Please don't miss the importance of these acts we so frequently gloss over as we 'sterilize' the birth of our Lord. This one event some two thousand years ago has literally changed the world. It split history in two.

And it took shepherds from their flocks. Please don't waste the wonder this year. Please find some new truth in the story of the Incarnation. Please follow the lead of the shepherds and forsake everything you hold dear to meet this Christ and then tell everyone you meet about the encounter!

You will not regret the decision and it might just split the history of your life in two as well!

Musings on my Life Group

2009-12-13T17:57:00.002-05:00

I have joined a new church and a new life group since my last post. On October 1, 2009 I joined the staff of Hope Springs Community Church. Today (December 13, 2009), I became a member of the church. It is kind of funny to me that I've been on staff for 10 weeks but was not a member of the church. I guess that is common, there are some churches who encourage certain staff to attend a separate church so they can experience worship without having to feel like they are 'working' ...

However, joining the new church also brought me and my lovely bride to a new Life Group. Our old church called them small groups, you church might have a completely different name, but here at Hope Springs, we call them Life Groups.

And that brings me to my musings from our time together today. Our group has studied the book of Philippians since our inception in October, wandering from home to home, taking a verse, section, or chapter at a time. Because we meet every other week, we didn't finish this four chapter book until today ... and quite honestly, I don't feel we are actually finished.

But during the conversation on contentment (Paul states he has learned to be content in any circumstance in Philippians 4:11) ... the talk turned to the more communal living style of the first century Christians. We wondered if part of the contentment was from truly "doing life together" as opposed to what you find in most modern church life groups.

Unfortunately, we were not able to come to any answers, leaving only questions. Our group isn't ready to sell everything (like the first century church in Acts) and move into a community of faith house ... but some good questions were asked that I'd like to challenge anyone who reads this blog (which is very few, I imagine):

1. We have a member who was unemployed for over a year. The question I'd like to challenge you with today is who do you know that is unemployed? Who do you know that you can connect that person with in hopes of getting them a job? Have you asked your friend if they are able to make their mortgage payment this month, and are you willing to help or find those who can if the answer is "no, I'm short on money"? What if that unemployed friend needs food? Will you help?

Unfortunately, these questions were never asked of our life group member ... fortunately, shortly after the group coming together, he found employment. I'd like to think that had his situation continued, our group would have done the right thing. I certainly hope we will should a similar situation arise in the future.

2. We are a young group, but almost immediately, we began to support each other in daily prayer. Are you connected to a community that prays for you daily? Do you have a list of people for whom you pray daily? If the answer is no, why not?

I know this is far from what the early church experienced. I know that deep in my soul I long for deeper community. But I believe this group is going in the right direction. We will never sell everything and become communal, but I do hope that as a group living lives in separate houses we will be as close to the Acts model as is humanly possible.

That is my prayer ... I'm starting to believe it is also the prayer of many of my life group partners.

Be blessed!

Ramblings on Acts 19 ... an assignment for Church

2009-09-14T19:56:00.004-04:00

I was asked today to post a blog for our church's newest series. We are studying the book of Acts and several people from the congregation have been assigned a chapter and have been asked to blog about what they've read. My assignment was Acts 19, which is really not a great chapter to write about. While it is a good historical account of the life of Paul and the persecution he encountered spreading the gospel of Christ, it isn't a great chapter like Acts 2 (the pouring out of the Holy Spirit), Acts 9 (the conversion of Saul, who later became Paul) or Acts 16 (the Philippian jailer - "Believe on the Lord Jesus Christ and thou shalt be saved").

So I was to read my assigned chapter, choose a key verse, blog a few paragraphs about what I encountered reading the passage, and then leave the readers with a few questions to ponder as they study the passage themselves.

Here is my first pass. I'm not sure if I'll send this version on for publication, but I wanted to make sure my initial thoughts did at least find its way to my own personal blog.

Key Verse – Acts 19:20 “In this powerful way the word of the Lord was spreading and gaining strength.”

In the early days of the church, God used several key people and numerous miracles to demonstrate his power. First Peter at Pentecost, then later Paul as he traveled throughout the Asian provinces, performed miracles in the name of Jesus. As a result, many turned to follow Jesus, leaving their past lives behind.

And when these new converts began to fully devote themselves to “The Way,” some local merchants felt the pinch. In Acts 19 we learn that because of Paul’s teachings, local silversmiths endured an economic downturn because they were selling fewer idols. Because former idol worshipers learned there is only one true God, they stopped frequenting the silversmith shops. I believe following Jesus should result in our lifestyles changing. Material things that were once important to us should now seem insignificant when compared to the furtherance of God’s kingdom.

The transformation in the lives of the followers of Christ in Ephesus was so great, people who live and work around them noticed. Men who had once profited off the sale of idols became so worried about their future, they incited a riot. While the culture has changed, and while we enjoy many freedoms in America, a life devoted to following Christ should look different than the lives of those around us. I don’t imagine our choices in the 21st century will lead to anyone inciting riots; however I do believe our daily choices, especially on things where we choose to spend our time and money, demonstrate where our hearts are truly focused.

When the world around us notices the changes in our lives, they will want to know more about what has caused us to change. As you tell them what has motivated your lifestyle metamorphosis, Acts 19:20 will continue to ring true in our communities: “In this powerful way the word of the Lord was spreading and gaining strength.”

As you read through Acts 19 today, ask yourself these questions:

1. Do I live my life each day in a manner that permits the word of the Lord to continue to spread to all I encounter?

2. Are there any areas in my finances that I have yet to turn over to God and if so, am I willing to surrender them to Him today?

3. What can I do today to show the love of God to someone, causing them to desire to know more about my Savior?

Church - The Way it Should Be

2009-08-25T21:28:00.003-04:00

It has been a long time since I've been able to post. In part, because I've been finishing the transformation of a warehouse in Lexington, Kentucky into a hip, innovative worship space for Hope Springs Church (www.hopespringschurch.com).

This is a great church; church the way it should be. This church understands God's design for His people is to help those around us who are in need. They have a laundry ministry for homeless people, a place for them to get clean clothes, conversation, and biblical instruction. They have a bible study at a local McDonald's where homeless people are able to get two dollar menu items along with community and Biblical teaching. They have a Friday night Celebrate Recovery service where 100+ people meet to continue their journey to recovery through worship, small groups, and fellowship over a meal. They send vans out each Sunday morning to pick up homeless people, people living in local shelters, and people living in half-way houses and rehab facilities to bring them to church. They also have a Sunday morning coffee ministry at Rupp Arena (home of the Kentucky Basketball Wildcats) to the homeless. The pastor is often heard saying, "God send us the people other churches don't want."

And as if this wasn't enough, this church that "gets it" also has a Hispanic congregation (Fuente de Avivamiento) that meets on Sunday and Wednesday nights for worship and teaching, and several days throughout the week for prayer. This isn't a separate congregation that "uses" the Hope Springs buildings, this is a congregation of a different language, yes, but the leaders at Hope Springs (David Calhoun for the Anglo congregation and Iosmar Alvarez for the Hispanic congregation) make every effort to ensure this is one church.

And it showed as we started in late May to transform a second warehouse off Versailles Road and Angliana in Lexington, Kentucky into a great new worship space. To see details of the transformation, where they were to where they are now, check out the post by my partner in this journey, Matt E. Cooper of Bargeheights. His post (http://bargeheights.com/?p=577) shows what the space was and what the new space looked like opening Sunday. Over the two plus months, members from both congregations worked side-by-side, often 10 to 12 hours a day, to make this dream a reality. As we sat together around midnight on the Saturday before the opening, I told the team that in the morning, this won't simply be a building, it will be your church. All your hard work will pay off as you stand up for the first time in this space to worship the King for whom we have all given so many hours this summer.

Sure, there is a lot left; we have the old space to transform into a new kids / youth space along with a college-age coffee house in one section. We have an additional 1,000 square feet that will become the new office wing. But I know one thing: this team of volunteers that loves Jesus enough to "get their hands dirty" with laundry ministries, homeless bible studies at McDonald's, coffee ministries at the place so many associate with basketball greatness but have no idea of the great needs that are right under their noses as they walk into the game, and understand that we serve one God regardless of skin color, language, or past sins will be able to accomplish this task. They have already won, they took an old warehouse and they turned it into a wonderful new worship center in just a few short months.

On the Books

2009-06-12T16:55:00.004-04:00

It's been over a month since I last published anything here ... in part because I'm working two projects in Lexington, Kentucky ... one at Southern Acres Christian Church (www.southernacres.org) and one at Hope Springs Community Church (www.hopespringschurch.com) ... and in part because I really haven't had much to say in the past month. Maybe the two things go together. Maybe my being tired from working so much causes my creativity to diminish.

As I thought about it more, I came to believe the reality is that spending so much time on the jobsite, even church jobsites, causes me to lose my connection to God. Sure I continue to pray, I continue to "think on these things" as Paul encourages us to do in Philippians 4:8, but I truly don't believe I allow God to truly penetrate my life like I do when I'm not so overly busy.

But something hit me the other morning at breakfast. I noticed the back of my cereal box had the phrase "On the Books" in bold letters. Around the phrase were nine pictures with a short description ... all laws from various states in America that were or are currently "on the books."

Let me list them for you:

1. Blue Earth, MN: Law declared that no child under the age of twelve may talk on the phone unless accompanied by a parent.

2. Alaska: It is forbidden to push a moose out of a plane in motion.

3. California: It is illegal to set a mousetrap without a hunting license.

4. Utah: It is against the law to fish from horseback.

5. Nevada: It is illegal to drive a camel on the highway.

6. Washington: Goldfish can ride the city buses in bowls only if they keep still.

7. Vermont: Whistling underwater is illegal.

8. Baltimore, MD: It is illegal to take a lion to the movies.

9. Kentucky: Transport of an ice cream cone in your pocket is prohibited.*

Now some of these laws were just ridiculous. Did they really have a problem with people taking lions to the movies in Maryland? Are swimming goldfish really a distraction on a bus in Washington? Do people often drive camels on the highway in Nevada?

However, some did make a little sense. For instance, if too many children were dialing 911, making it difficult for actual emergency calls to come in to the switchboard, making a phone usage law for children in Minnesota would be prudent. A cash-strapped state like California could easily raise additional funds by collecting hunting license fees for each mousetrap sale, helping reduce the state's deficit. Or was I over thinking this?

In the end, no matter how much I considered what would compel a local or state jurisdiction to complete the process to turn any of these ideas into law, I could find no good solution for any of them. These laws had no business being discussed in a public forum, and certainly should have never passed a vote by elected officials or a local community.

Yet that is how it often becomes between us and God. He is always there for us, always wanting to be in community with us, yet we try to make crazy rules we need to come before His throne. Why do I feel so far from God, even when I'm working on improving two of His churches? It's not because God has moved away from me. He is still there, waiting for me to get over myself and simply lean into Him. Instead, I create some insane barrier of some type ... some nonsense law if you will, that widens the gulf originally created by sin.

My desire to do it on my own ... that age old struggle all humans battle ... gets in the way. As I recognize it, I am able to simply turn around and find my God waiting right where He was when I left. And the more I do this, turn to face God and forget myself, hopefully fewer "on the books" types of distractions will be allowed to penetrate my life, keeping me focused where I need to be; on God.

*Taken from the back of a Kroger Apple Cinnamon Toasted Oats Cereal box

Feel Close to God?

2009-04-30T13:58:00.003-04:00

I've been wondering something lately, how do I continue to move closer to God. Kelly and I have been in a conversation with someone in our life who has moved away from God during the years we've known this person, so much so they are now a self-proclaimed atheist. In a recent email exchange, Kelly mentioned that while this person has moved away from God, she has been drawing closer to God. It got me thinking, what does moving closer to God look like?

It wasn't until I spent some time on YouTube this morning (imagine that, finding God on YouTube), that I found an answer.

"When I read the lives of the great saints, they didn't necessarily feel close to God. When I read the Psalms, I get the feeling that David and the other Psalmists felt quite far away from God for most of the time. Closeness to God is not about feelings. Closeness to God is about obedience. ... I don't know how you feel close to God. And no one I know that seems to be close to God knows anything about those feelings either. I know if we obey, occasionally the feeling follows. Not always, but occasionally. I know if we disobey, we don't have a shot at it. Jesus said, 'Whatever you do to the least of these, my brothers, you've done it to me.' and this is what I've come to think; that if I want to identify fully with Jesus Christ, who I claim to be my Savior and Lord, the best way that I can do that is to identify with the poor. ... Christianity is not about building an absolutely secure little niche in the world where you can live with your perfect little wife and your perfect little children in a beautiful little house where you have no gays or minority groups anywhere near you. Christianity is about learning to love like Jesus loved, and Jesus loved the poor and Jesus loved the broken."
(Rich Mullins live in concert in Lufkin, Texas)

Are you struggling with the same question? Do you desire to be closer to God in your life? Then take a look around you. Are you living like Jesus did? Are you surrounded by the poor, hurting, broken-hearted misfits of this world?

I am currently working with a church here in Lexington that finds itself in the midst of the crowd I imagine Jesus would attract were he to walk the earth in the 21st century. This church is based on recovery programs, attracting recovering alcoholics and drug addicts, ex-convicts, gang members, homeless people, and everyone else the modern church has neglected. In a recent project meeting, the pastor actually said, in his opening prayer, "Lord send us the people the other churches don't want."

Do you want to find closeness to God? It will cost you everything you have: family, friends, home, and savings (Matthew 10:37-39, Mark 10:29, Luke 9:58); so be sure you truly want to draw closer to God before you take the first step. But if you do, God will meet you there.

Have I drawn closer to God in recent years? Only enough to know that taking any additional steps will cost me everything, and I simply don't have enough faith to continue. Maybe God will show me where that faith comes from in the next chapter of my life. Right now, I more resonate with another bit of wisdom from Rich Mullins; here are the words from his song "Hard to Get:"

"You who live in heaven, hear the prayers of those of us who live on earth. Who are afraid of being left by those we love, and who get hardened by the hurt.

Do you remember when You lived down here where we all scrape to find the faith to ask for daily bread? Did You forget about us after You had flown away? Well I memorized every word You said still I'm so scared, I'm holding my breath while You're up there just playing hard to get.

You who live in radiance, hear the prayers of those of us who live in skin. We have a love that's not as patient as Yours was still we do love now and then.

Did You ever know loneliness? Did You ever know need?Do You remember just how long a night can get?

When You were barely holding on and Your friends fall asleep and don't see the blood that's running in Your sweat.

Will those who mourn be left uncomforted while You're up there just playing hard to get?

And I know you bore our sorrows, and I know you feel our pain, and I know it would not hurt any less even if it could be explained.

And I know that I am only lashing out at the One who loves me most, and after I figured this, somehow all I really need to know

Is if You who live in eternity hear the prayers of those of us who live in time? We can't see what's ahead and we can not get free of what we've left behind. I'm reeling from these voices that keep screaming in my ears all the words of shame and doubt, blame and regret.

I can't see how You're leading me unless You've led me here where I'm lost enough to let myself be led. And so You've been here all along I guess, it's just Your ways and You are just plain hard to get."

All Because of Jesus I'm Alive

2009-04-22T09:42:00.003-04:00

Have you heard Steve Fee's song, "All Because of Jesus I'm Alive?" It plays on Christian radio each day; it's a very popular song. Our church sang it as our worship opener on Easter, so the song has really been ringing around in my mind since.

So when I heard a short spot from Steve Fee on a national Christian radio station a few days ago, I knew I needed to blog about his comments. If you haven't heard the song, or just simply want to hear it again, click here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rmdylCFUBs8.

Steve Fee is the Worship Leader at North Point Community Church. If you are not familiar with North Point, this is Andy Stanley's church outside Atlanta, GA. As Mega Church, North Point is often imitated by other smaller, local churches. As such, North Point is often blazing a trail for the modern church while ensuring the integrity of the Gospel of Jesus.

As Worship Leader, I'm sure Steve is very in tune with the responsibility of ministering to his own church family while also carrying the additional load from the eyes of other worship leaders around the country, and possibly the globe, watching his every move, seeking something they can bring to their own churches. So when I hear a Steve Fee song, I often tune in, listening beyond the simple background noise of the radio, trying to hear the word Steve intended all churches across the globe to receive.

All Because of Jesus has taken on new meaning, however, after hearing Steve's comments on the radio the other day. He said: "Jesus did not die to make bad people good people; he died to make dead people living people."

This comment resonated with me, because as much as I try to be good, I can not. Certainly I am to do all things through Christ (Philippians 4:13), but so often I fail to keep an eye on my savior. I turn to do things on my own. In the words of Paul, "For what I do is not the good I want to do; no, the evil I do not want to do-this I keep on doing." (Romans 7:19).

So it was a comfort to me to hear that the object of Jesus' death was not to make me good; it was to give me life. I'm not espousing "worm theology" here. I believe I have value and do not beat myself up daily over my continuous sinful nature. However, I also recognize that without Jesus, I would have no good in me. The only good that is seen by others from me is because of the transformation that Jesus has made, and continues to make, in me.

(If you are not familiar with "worm theology," then let me help. Basically, there was a belief a few hundred years ago that we were worthless, and had to come to God as "worms in the despair and dirt of our sin." The origins are sketchy, but can be traced to an old Isaac Watts song, "Alas and Did My Savior Bleed" as well as some teachings by John Calvin and John Wesley. Basically I believe "worm theology" to be self-deprecating, and do not believe the God of the universe sees me as a worm, even in the midst of my sin. I believe that because Jesus humbled himself to become man, died on the cross, and was raised from the dead, that I have value in the sight of God. Certainly God hates my sin, but in His infinite wisdom, He can separate the sin from the sinner, something mankind finds extremely difficult, if not impossible.)

Knowing I am not being held to the standard of "good," understanding that God's love is sufficient, that the blood of Jesus has once and for all paid the price of my sin, past and future (Romans 5:17), was transformational to me. After all, if only God is good (Psalm 53:3 and Romans 3:10), how can I be expected to live into a standard of good, even with God's help? Hearing God did not come to make me good, but to give me life, put it all in perspective.

Certainly, as I begin to walk in God, I will begin to develop the fruit of His spirit (Galations 5:16-18 and I John 5:18), but where I begin, the starting point of my journey was not "good" it was simply "life." To me, this was freeing.

Thank you Steve Fee for sharing truth, not just to your own home church in Georgia, but to the entire world. It's all because of Jesus I'm alive!

Has the Modern Church Lost Its Relevance?

2009-03-15T21:24:00.002-04:00

I rarely read for entertainment any more. Most of the books I choose are some kind of non-fiction: leadership, Christian living, societal issues, etc. This is true of the book I am currently reading. In 1998, Barbara Enrenreich, an author, did some journalistic research on living at or below the poverty level in America and published her experiences in several US cities as an "unskilled laborer" in the book "Nickel and Dimed: On (Not) Getting By in America. I'm only part way through this book, but something Ms. Enrenreich wrote at the beginning of her second experience stopped me short.

Ms. Enrenreich has just arrived in Portland, ME. Knowing nobody, she notices there is going to be a revival tent meeting, and decided to attend. As a self proclaimed atheist, I'm not entirely sure why she chose this event as her first means of entering the community, but her description of the evening caught my attention.

"The preaching goes on, interrupted with dutiful 'amens.' It would be nice if someone would read this sad-eyed crowd the Sermon on the Mount.... But Jesus makes his appearance here only as a corpse; the living man, the wine-guzzling vagrant and precocious socialist, is never once mentioned, nor anything he ever had to say. Christ crucified rules, and it may be that the true business of modern Christianity is to crucify him again and again so that he can never get a word out of his mouth."*

As a Christ-follower, it often pains me to hear how atheists, agnostics, and other people outside of the church describe Christianity, but I have to admit, Ms. Enrenreich was pretty accurate in her assessment of modern Christianity. Churches today have become more about religion and self-perpetuation and moved away from the actual message of love Jesus brought to earth.

Sure, I can't agree with every word Ms. Enrenreich wrote; I don't consider my Savior to be a wine-guzzler. Vagrant? Yes. Socialist? Certainly.

Jesus came to dispel organized religion. He constantly fought against the Pharisees and teachers of Jewish law, telling them they were too caught up in their religious traditions to see God. If Jesus walked into the modern church, I'm certain His message would be identical to that given to the first century Jews. We have lost the message of Christ.

"Do unto others as you would have them do unto you," still finds it way into many sermons and churches. Even great motivational speakers like Zig Ziglar tout: "The best way to get what you want is to help someone get what they want," a modernization of the golden rule.

But this is simply because it can be self-serving. You won't hear, "If you do good to those who do good to you, what credit is that to you? For even sinners do the same." (Luke 6:33 - NASB) taught from many churches. Why would you when we live in a "What's in it for me?" society?

But that is what Jesus taught. "Love your enemy. Care for the widows and orphans. Do not repay evil with evil. Do not consider yourself better than anyone else. Sell all you have and give to the poor. Pick up your cross and follow me."

In the 21st century, where the wealth and prosperity gospel reigns, is Jesus muted by His church as Ms. Enrenreich suggests? In many congregations, yes. I hope those become fewer as His followers dig deeper on their own, searching for the Jesus that accepted women of ill repute to wash His feet in tears, ate with sinners, touched the unclean lepers, and showed the world women and children are as valued as men in every society.

May that Jesus reign in your life.

* Enrenreich, Barbara: Nickel and Dimed: On (Not) Getting By in America. Metropolitan Books, 2001, pages 68 - 69.

When God Ran

2009-03-09T13:37:00.002-04:00

Sunday I was producing at our Georgetown campus, thinking about what to share during the creative team's communion time, and the lyrics of a song came to mind. The song, "When God Ran" was originally recorded by Benny Hester, but I was introduced to it by Phillips, Craig, and Dean.

Based on the story of the Prodigal Son, this song talks about God in a way many people often miss. Since we our church is currently studying Jesus through the eyes of Doctor Luke (author of the Gospel of Luke), and since the story of the Prodigal Son is found in Luke 15, I felt this song and a reflection on the Prodigal Son would be a great lesson for communion. I was amazed, however, at how much it hit me.

To better gain context, please click over to http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b1O4eS9jxfM and watch Phillips, Craig, and Dean set up, and then sing the song, "When God Ran." Then come back here and check out my thoughts.

Having watched the video (I sincerely hope you did prior to reading on), maybe the rest of this will also have a profound impact on you today.

As part of our study of the book of Luke, we are hearing from different people through video clips, people who study the scriptures: historians, theologians, priests, etc. On commented in his video spot at our small group last night that we often miss the important things of scripture because we read scripture with our 21st century bias. In order to really understand scripture, you have to look through the eyes of the people to whom Jesus was speaking. Doing that, there is a new appeal to the story of the Prodigal.

Asking for his share of the inheritance wasn't a simple request of an heir asking for an advance on his trust fund. We see that every day in America (think Paris Hilton, et. al.), so we can often miss the importance of the request that was readily understood in first century Judea. This young man insulted his father by asking for his inheritance. He was in essence saying, "Dad, I want you dead so I can get what is coming to me. My life would be much better enjoying the riches of your labors than it is simply living in your house."

As a father, the pain of our father in the story, becomes real when I understand this version of the request of the son.

Another point that is easy to miss is in the midst of the story, the point when the Prodigal returns home. Reading "And while he was still a long way off, his father saw him coming. Filled with love and compassion, he ran to his son, embraced him, and kissed him" (Luke 15:20 - NLT) in the 21st century doesn't really carry much meaning. We can easily gloss beyond the three letter word "ran," jumping straight to the embrace and kiss.

"Yes! The love of a father. Unconditional acceptance of his Prodigal," we say. But skipping that three letter word misses another truth not lost on the first century Jews. Men did not run in public in Jesus' day. To do so would bring dishonor to that man. Running towards a son who had wished him dead, squandered his money, and now is returning would be much worse. Jesus' listeners understood this. Unfortunately, many twenty-first century readers don't.

So, seeing this father run would have caused shock and horror in the minds of the listeners. Those who understood the deeper meaning (this story is an illustration of how God treats us, His children), would have been unconscionable for Jesus' original listeners.

Yesterday was a good day of resting in God's gracious arms. Knowing the "Immovable Rock" ran towards me, wrapped His arms around me, kissed me, and welcomed me home after I'd told Him I much rather He was dead was a good place to be.

I hope knowing a bit of the "story behind the story" also helps bring new life to the Prodigal for you. Rest knowing the God of the Universe ran to you when you after you had rejected Him and wished Him dead to you. Know His love for you eclipses anything you may believe, feel, or dread. He is your resting place. Find solace in that today.

Are You Where God Wants You to Be?

2009-02-27T16:51:00.003-05:00

I've been struggling with something for the past several weeks: "Am I where God wants me to be?" Most specifically, are my current career choice and my vocational goals in line with God's plan for my life.

Many may think I'm being too religious here ... does God really care how I pay my bills as long as I am in a legal, moral, and ethical position? I believe He does. I have a friend at church who I've had the "macro vs. micro" God conversation; does God delve into each and every part of our lives (micro God) or simply step in during the big moments (macro God). I believe that as a friend, God desires to be micro God, but as free-willed individuals we often relegate Him to macro God.

So you may believe I am placing too much at the feet of my God when I wonder if my current career choices are where He desires me to be, but I believe my thought processes are "spot dead on."

I've known for years my calling is to help the local church. I've simply struggled against the call because of personal financial goals. I want to be debt free (something Kelly and I continue to strive to achieve), I want to have a "safe" retirement portfolio (something nobody can seem to define in today's economic reality), I want to have a house, a boat, another motorcycle (Kelly is tired of riding on mine and wants her own -- or so I tell myself). I want the two week family vacation at the beach condo (rented, I don't need to own it), I want to be able to go out to a great restaurant simply because the urge comes along.

Yet experience tells me that people working in full-time church vocation don't tend to have those things; not those who can stand up to a 20/20 or 60 Minutes telecast, that is. So I've struggled through everyday life, chasing the almighty dollar at work, knowing I was not following the passion God had placed in my heart.

Until a year ago, when Kelly and I sold the Allstate agency and I began to contract for tech installations in churches. It went well the first several months, while I wasn't constantly working, I earned enough to keep the household afloat (when combined with Kelly's income). But lately, things have not gone so well. The company that was able to keep me working several projects in 2008 has not had sufficient work to keep me going so far in 2009. Money has dwindled and bills are going to pile up if I don't find income soon.

So I've been struggling with "where does faith in 'God will provide' intersect with 'I need to pay my mortgage'?"

While I still struggle to find the answer, I want to share the following I received from some friends today ...

A few questions to ponder as you are discerning:

1) Do you have a peace about where you are heading?

2) Does it line up with God's word? God definitely won't be leading you to something that does not align with His word!

3) Does it align with how God has uniquely shaped and wired you (your passions, talents, gifts, life roles, etc.)?

4) STOP doubting and trust that "still small voice."

5) Are you "abiding?" (John 15:5)

6) Is there fruit? If you make it your business to abide, there will be fruit (although not all fruit is visible).

7) Are there any confirmations?

8) Would your steps "bring glory to God?"

9) Could you be in a "waiting place" where character is being developed, or where you should focus on some learning before your next step?

10) Are your steps "surrendered?" i.e. If they don't go how you plan, what will your reaction be?

I hope my struggle to understand where God is leading in my life, and the questions my friends Kelly T. and Rosalie G. have offered will help you with some quandary you face in your life today. Remember, Lisa Hammond says "the most important thing you will ever do is become who you were meant to be."

Finally Home

2009-02-18T12:11:00.003-05:00

Yesterday I was introduced to a new song, "Finally Home" by Mercy Me. A friend has been posting the first lines of the second chorus as his facebook status for the past few days, and I asked him where the line originated. He provided me with a link (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0EkI0WE4Aps) to the Mercy Me video.

"Then I'll gaze upon the throne of the King, frozen in my steps, and all the questions that I swore I would ask; words just won't come."

It hit me at that moment, like a ton of bricks, as we stare into the face of God, everything that has come before won't matter. Questions like I've posted here on this blog, questions like I'm asking in my newest book "18 Inches," all will be wiped away as we stand frozen in our steps.

"God is God and I am not," Steven Curtis Chapman wrote. This is something I struggle with daily in my life as I journey towards the 10:10 promise. I want to be in control. I want to be the boss. I want things to work out to my benefit. Don't you?

Yet when they don't, we don't blame ourselves. We blame God. We took the reigns away from Him, and then have the audacity to blame Him when we wreck.

Most intriguing to me is we then say, "I'm going to ask God why ________" (fill in your own blank here). But on that day we won't ask "Why did bad things happen to good people? Why did you take my baby? Why did you allow so much pain and suffering?"

Mercy Me brings new reality with "Finally Home." Standing in the throne room of God, no questions will be asked, words will fail us as surly as our steps will falter and we fall to our knees (Romans 14:11).

This could be a sad song, a song of torment, standing speechless before God in anguish over the sins we have committed as He reads to us from "The Book." Isn't that how many people see God? Judge, jury, and executioner. God sitting on His throne, writing down each sin we commit, holding us accountable on "Judgment Day?" (Matthew 12:36)

Fortunately, Mercy Me wrote about a homecoming. Going back to verse one we hear, "I'm going to wrap my arms around my daddy's neck and tell him that I've missed him, and tell him all about the man that I became, and hope that it pleased him. There's so much I want to say, there's so much I want you to know."

Yes, we will stand before God speechless, how could we not, mere mortal standing in the presence of our creator, God. But our speechlessness will not be fear of judgment for those who have followed God, it will be awe. Awe that He loved us enough to send His very own son to restore the relationship He created in Eden. Awe that He wants us to live eternity with Him. Awe that He wants to hear about the man (or woman) I've become, and to celebrate that with me.

Finally Home. Can't you imagine it now?

Living in Community

2009-02-17T10:26:00.005-05:00

I recently joined facebook. I'd heard about this social networking phenomenon from friends, but never really thought much about it. The night I joined, I was warned by people accepting my "friend requests" I should watch out, facebook can be addictive. I didn't pay much attention to those warnings, I've been online in one form or another since 1995 (yes, I was an early Internet adopter ... even learning HTML in 1994), so another forum wouldn't change my life that much. Would it?

What I didn't realize, what I couldn't realize until I joined facebook was how starved people are for community. I have "friends" on facebook who post their status almost hourly. It appears they can't survive the day without letting everyone know what they are doing.

I have other friends that I don't believe have posted a status change since I joined nearly six weeks ago.

The interesting thing to me, is how much people share. This is a relative safe place, if you've set your account up properly, only your friends can see what you write. Yet there are options where friends of friends can also see. So, assuming social networking theory is correct (only six steps are required to move from any person in the world to any other person in the world), there are a lot of people who could read about your life.

I have friends who post about illnesses, both personal and family. I have friends who post travel schedules. I have friends who post their thoughts. One friend recently became engaged, another recently left a relationship.

The most interesting posts (one I also have been known to do) is the dinner post. I often see people going for sushi, baking bread, cooking some great meal. There are friends who then post recipes when requested and those that simply post them, regardless of having been asked. I often have friends comment about what I've shared we are eating, sometimes having them boldly ask when they can come over to share the meal with us.

Beyond status updates, people share pictures, and some post strings like: "25 Random Things," or "The Bucket List," the "BBC Book List," or "I've Seen ... of 239 Films," and even "Senior Year of High School."

Some people are creative, some are funny, some are simply lonely and looking for community. It truly has been eye opening. In this modern world, where we are only six degrees of separation from anyone, we have to go online to find community.

I guess that is why the new Dentyne chewing gum "Make Face Time" advertisement is so appealing to me (the Youtube video of this commercial is linked to the title of this post). If you want community, true community, you have to make time. Sitting alone on your couch, in your office, or in the airport keying your status into your laptop, blackberry, or cell phone is a cheap substitute for true face time.

Get off the couch and go outside. Spring is teasing, so it should be easier. Find the time (I know, who has time) and make some friends; flesh and blood, right there with you friends. It may get hard, relationships come with all kinds of issues, but you will ultimately be grateful to have people with whom you are sharing your life.

I know I have some new friends, my small group that started in October, and we are grateful three other couples have joined the friendship journey with us. Where will your next "friend request accepted" be found? I hope not inside a computer.

God Doesn't Know Who I Am?

2009-02-13T15:03:00.006-05:00

"God doesn't know who I am." This frightful sentence was uttered on the February 12, 2009 episode of Grey's Anatomy. Dr. Addison Montgomery was in the chapel, desiring to pray for her very sick brother, but felt inadequate and incapable of prayer. "We only go to church on Christmas," she uttered. "God doesn't know who I am."

It could have been a terrific cinematic moment, even if it was only shot for the small screen. This vulnerable time in a great doctor's life could have been used to show just how much God cares. But then this is Hollywood, and if you've read some of my previous posts, you know how little regard I hold for finding God in Hollywood.

Dr. Callie Torres was with Addison, got on her knees, and said a little prayer about her love life, her lesbian love life, much to the delight and dismay of Dr. Montgomery.

When Dr. Torres got off her knees she said, "You're an amazing doctor, you save babies. God knows who you are."

Isn't that the quintessential Hollywood or human response to God? God knows me because of who I am and what I do. Stop to think about it, don't we relate to each other based on who we are and what we do? Isn't the initial instinct of each person walking into a room to size up everyone and determine where we fit in with this group? Don't we all want to ask, within seconds of meeting someone new, "What do you do?"

Why would we consider God any differently? Isn't He simply "one of us?" Isn't He to be treated just like one of the guys?

Yes, and no. God wants to be our friend, He wants to be in relationship with us. But He is more than "just one of the guys." He is THE guy.

We read in scripture God is a jealous God (Exodus 34:14, Deuteronomy 4:24). He alone should be the object of our worship and desire. He alone deserves our praise.

Yet we try to place ourselves on a pedestal, only turning to God when things go wrong. That is where Addison found herself. She would not have gone to the hospital chapel, never have thought to turn to God, had her brother not been about to die. Without this tragedy in her life, Dr. Montgomery would have continued to believe she was the source of her strength.

"Oh yes, you shaped me first inside, then out;
you formed me in my mother's womb.
I thank you, High God - you're breathtaking!
Body and soul, I am marvelously made!
I worship in adoration - what a creation!
You know me inside and out,
you know every bone in my body;
You know exactly how I was made, bit by bit,
how I was sculpted from nothing into something.
Like an open book, you watched me grow from conception to birth;
all the stages of my life were spread out before you,
The days of my life all prepared
before I'd even lived one day."
Psalm 139:13-16, The Message

Oh yes Addison Montgomery, God knows you. Not because of who you are or what you've done. God knows you because He made you.

"Not because of who I am, but because of what you've done. Not because of what I've done, but because of who you are." That is the message I would have sent to Addison. Just say what's on your heart, God will listen because that's who He is.

Darwin or Lincoln?

2009-02-12T22:26:00.004-05:00

Today, February 12, 2009 is the 200th anniversary of two historical men's birth. Both Charles Darwin and Abraham Lincoln were born on this date 200 years ago. Both men have had a significant impact on history, one creating a new religion, calling it science, and one allowing a nation to be torn apart knowing it was the only way to ultimately ensure "that nation, or any nation so conceived and so dedicated, can long endure." So how does Google, perhaps one of the iconic businesses of that nation celebrate today? They change their logo in honor of Darwin, not Lincoln. Google may not realize it was the efforts of Abraham Lincoln and each and every American to come since that has ensured their success. It is the liberties they enjoy in this great nation, the opportunities that only America can provide that have given them the incredible growth they have experienced. Larry Page and Sergey Brin, you may believe Darwin is a hero, many do. But on this day, February 12, 2009, the hero you should be celebrating is not the man who has brainwashed a world into thinking he created science when he only created a new religion. You should honor and celebrate the man who saved the great nation that provided you the opportunity to become two of the first billionaires of the Internet economy.

Product of My Generation?

2009-02-09T10:47:00.002-05:00

I used to think my generation did not have that one great "where were you when?" moment. Now I know we don't. We have far too many.

My great-grandparents remember where they were when Wall Street crashed, my grandparents can remember where they were when Pearl Harbor was bombed, my parents remember where they were when President Kennedy was shot. My generation can remember:

1. Where I was when a President resigned in disgrace.
2. Where I was when our entire nation was held hostage for 444 days along with 52 of our diplomats in Iran.
3. Where I was when President Reagan was shot.
4. Where I was when the Marines were bombed in Lebanon.
5. Where I was when the Space Shuttle Challenger exploded on national television.
6. Where I was on "Black Monday" and the job I lost because of this stock market "adjustment."
7. Where I was when the Berlin Wall fell.
8. Where I was when the US started "Shock and Awe" against the Iraqi nation.
9. Where I was when a President was Impeached.
10. Where I was when a 0.009% margin determined a Presidential election.
11. Where I was when terrorists used planes as bombs and missiles against our nation.
12. Where I was when the Space Shuttle Columbia disintegrated on national television.
13. Where I was when the United States once again invaded Iraq.
14. Where I was when the first African-American President was elected.

It is no wonder our generation has difficulty finding an identity. We have so many from which to choose. We were the product of a generation that questioned everything, and so did we. We became the "Me" generation, pursuing everything, no matter the cost.

We lived fast lives, drove fast cars, ran with fast women, and our drugs were designed to speed us up, not mellow us out like those of our parents. Our anthem was "Life in the Fast Lane," and we did whatever it took to stay there.

We created "Dot Com" companies based on nothing but a dream, and made millions, sometimes billions, of dollars. We bought water in a bottle and just listening to music wasn't enough, we needed to see it on TV.

My generation didn't have a "great evil" to fight. We were not faced with Fascism or Communism as enemies. Our enemies are terrorists who use human shields and send children and pregnant women strapped with bombs into our midst. There is no longer the "honor" of men facing each other on the battlefield. Now every person, every place is a potential target. We fight an "unseen" enemy who is willing to break every rule of engagement simply to annihilate our way of life.

As we turn 40 and beyond, will we finally realize there is a bigger purpose than "Me?" Will we finally step up and take control of our lives, responsibility for our actions, and begin to lead? Our parents are ready to retire, turn over the reigns if you will. Are we going to take them, or are we simply going to continue to focus on ourselves, leaving our children the repsonsibility to lead because we chose "Me."

I hope my generation decides soon. I'd hate to wind up simply being a footnote of history, the "dash" that connected our parents to our children. Because our children are seeking an identity and many of them want to lead. I just hope we don't acquiesce, but let them know their time will come, but right now is our time to give back. We've taken so much, don't you think we need to leave a little for those who come behind?

Too Honest?

2009-02-06T12:03:00.002-05:00

Kelly was telling me the other night about a client's son-in-law. It appears this son-in-law recently tried to find employment at a grocery store, but was turned down.

I'm not sure the store, the town, or the name of anyone involved, but I just had to tell the world about this.

It seems the interview process included several scenarios. Our doomed candidate was asked, "If a family member or friend were to come through your lane, would you bag some of their items without scanning them?"

His answer? "No."

Another question was, "If someone came through your line, but did not have enough money for the items they had chosen, would you let them go with all the items if they promised you they would return with the balance of the money?"

Not having fallen off the turnip truck the morning of the interview, our subject recognized the potential for a scam, and answered, "No."

At the end of the interview our applicant was told he would not be offered the job because he was too honest.

I wonder what our future holds if honest people can't even find gainful employment at the neighborhood grocery? Oh, I know: corporate barons who steal from the masses to line their own pockets. Hey wait, isn't that already our reality?

God is Suffering?

2009-02-04T12:24:00.003-05:00

Dietrich Bonhoeffer wrote, in a 1943 letter to his sister Sabine, "It is good to learn early enough that suffering and God are not a contradiction but rather a unity, for this idea that God himself is suffering is one that has always been one of the most convincing teachings of Christianity. I think God is nearer to suffering than to happiness, and to find God in this way gives peace and rest and a strong and courageous heart."

I read those words last night in the book Death by Suburb: How to Keep the Suburbs from Killing Your Soul, written by David L. Goetz. It struck me like a kidney punch; I almost dropped the book.

God is suffering? I had to know more. Enter BibleGateway.com. I ran a search for suffering and found thirty (30) passages that combined suffer(ed) or suffer(ing) as it pertains to Jesus. But each of these passages were either prophesies or historical references to the suffering he must endure on the cross. I understand Jesus suffered on the cross, but does that mean he continues to suffer? Bonhoeffer used the present tense: "God himself is suffering." Is God still suffering today?

I had to find the scripture Bonhoeffer used to write these words. So I looked at other words that would show suffering in God. I chose to search wept, anguish and grieve (all searches were run using the New International Version).

Other than John 11:35 (Jesus wept ... Jesus crying at the grave of his friend Lazarus), Jesus was only recorded in the gospels as having wept one other time. Luke 19:41 records Jesus weeping over the city of Jerusalem as he is about to enter during his final days before the crucifixion. This chosen city of God, the center of His nation on earth, is about to crucify the God who has watched over her for centuries. This causes Jesus to weep in anguish. He has cared for this city and it will now crucify him. Jesus was in distress, but it appears to be tied to the crucifixion, not anything else. I still do not believe I have found scriptural justification for Bonhoeffer's ascertain.

The only use of anguish relating to God was Luke 22:44, where Jesus was in anguish as he prayed in the garden prior to his capture and eventual crucifixion. Again, this reference is tied to the crucifixion. I feel no closer to understanding Bonhoeffer's statement.

It wasn't until I searched grieve(d), that I was finally able to understand Bonhoeffer's statement. Merriam-Webster's online dictionary defines grieve as: "to cause to suffer." Searching the New International Version I found eleven (11) references to God being grieved.

Genesis 6:6-7 - God is grieved (caused to suffer) because he created man.

I Samuel 15:11, 35 - God is grieved (caused to suffer) because he appointed Saul king of Israel.

II Samuel 24:16 and I Chronicles 21:15 - God is grieved (caused to suffer) as He doles out punishment on David and all of Israel for David's sin in conducting a census. God causes the punishment to end as a result of His grief.

Psalm 78:40 - the psalmist is talking about how frequently God was grieved (caused to suffer) by the Israelites as they wandered in the desert after leaving Egypt.

Isaiah 63:10 - God is grieved (caused to suffer) each time His people rebelled.

Jeremiah 42:10 - God is grieved (caused to suffer) because His people are suffering under the hands of Babylon. God promises to "build you up and not tear you down."

Ezekiel 6:9 - God is grieved (caused to suffer) because of the adulterous heart of His nation.

Ephesians 4:30 - The only New Testament scripture: "Do not grieve the Holy Spirit."

How do we grieve the Holy Spirit? By straying from His teachings; going our own adulterous ways. So Dietrich Bonhoeffer was right, God is suffering. He suffers each time we sin. And because I know myself, God truly is suffering a whole lot more than He is happy as he looks at me.

Thankfully I have Psalm 103:12, Hebrews 10:12, and I John 1:9 to assure me that God forgives and the price for my sin is paid in full. While God is grieved (suffering) when I sin, He has forgiven me of my sin and provided for me eternal salvation. Thank you Jesus for suffering on my behalf so that God does not have to eternally suffer over my sin.

Movie Clip, Motiviational Story, Life Application

2009-02-03T10:17:00.003-05:00

It seems to me the nondenominational church I attend has become stuck in a "movie clip, motivational story, life application" rut. Each weekend as I attend I can be assured a movie clip of some sort (recent choices have been Spiderman III and The Bucket List) an inspirational story as part of the sermon (someone struggling with cancer who continues to place God first in their life ... focusing on living, not dying), and a life application section where I'm given a few points to help me improve my life.

Please understand, I don't believe my church has strayed from the gospel message. They continue to have weekends where people's lives are changed from all accounts, yet I feel I've gone back in time. There was a joke in the late 1970's, early 1980's that a good Baptist Seminary taught a great sermon consisted of three points and a joke. I guess the updated version for the twenty-first century is movie clip, motivational story, and a life application.

I wonder what the Desert Fathers would think of this approach. These people wandered into the desert of Egypt in the third century to escape persecution. They remained in the desert after the persecution ended under Constantine I because they had found God.

True, Jesus told us to "go and make disciples of all nations" (Matthew 28:19), so maybe the hermit approach of the Desert Fathers is not the best approach, but is trying to find God in a Hollywood movie a better alternative?

Consider Romans 12:1-2: "So here's what I want you to do, God helping you: Take your everyday, ordinary life—your sleeping, eating, going-to-work, and walking-around life—and place it before God as an offering. Embracing what God does for you is the best thing you can do for him. Don't become so well-adjusted to your culture that you fit into it without even thinking. Instead, fix your attention on God. You'll be changed from the inside out. Readily recognize what he wants from you, and quickly respond to it. Unlike the culture around you, always dragging you down to its level of immaturity, God brings the best out of you, develops well-formed maturity in you." (The Message)

How does placing Hollywood front and center in each service measure against "don't become so well-adjusted to your culture that you fit into it without even thinking?" Doesn't placing Hollywood in a service demonstrate we have become so adjusted to twenty-first century living it doesn't faze us to place the world right in the middle of church?

I understand people coming through the doors of the modern church are looking for a bridge. I understand that in order to reach the world, you have to attract the world. But where is the line crossed between going to the world and becoming the world? Where does the pursuit of God get so muddied with our use of worldly images, those seeking don't see God anymore?

Jesus himself taught us to "seek first the kingdom of God" (Matthew 6:33). Jesus was talking about worry in this passage, but I believe that if we truly seek God's kingdom, not only will clothing and food be provided, but spiritual life as well. I simply can't believe that watching Spiderman helps me seek God.

I think the best modern example of seeking the kingdom of God was provided by Donald Miller in his book Through Painted Deserts: Light, God, and Beauty on the Open Road*:

I’ve learned, too, that I don’t really know very much about anything. I mean, I used to have all these theories about life. I thought I had everybody figured out, even God, but I don’t. I think the woods, being away from all the clingy soot of commercialism, have taught me life is enormous, and I am very tiny in the middle of it. I feel, at times, like a droplet of water in a raging river. I know for a fact that as a grain of sand compares in size to the earth itself, I compare in size to the cosmos. I am that insignificant. And yet the chemicals in my brain that make me feel beauty when I look up at the stars, when I watch the sunset, indicate I must be here for a reason. I think I would sum it up this way: life is not a story about me, but it is being told to me, and I can be glad of that. I think that is the why of life and, in fact, the why of this ancient faith I am caught up in: to enjoy God. The stars were created to dazzle us, like a love letter; light itself is just a metaphor, something that exists outside of time, made up of what seems like nothing, infinite in its power, something that can be experienced but not understood, like God. Relationships between men and women indicate something of the nature of God—that He is relational, that He feels love and loss. It’s all metaphor, and the story is about us; it’s about all of us who God made, and God Himself, just enjoying each other. It strikes me how far the commercials are from this reality, how deadly they are, perhaps. Months ago I would have told you life was about doing, about jumping through religious hoops, about impressing other people, and my actions would have told you this is done by buying possessions or keeping a good image or going to church. I don’t believe that anymore. I think we are supposed to stand in deserts and marvel at how the sun rises. I think we are supposed to love our friends and introduce people to the story, to the peaceful, calming why of life. I think life is spirituality.

If I could, if it would be responsible, I would live in these woods forever: I would let my beard grow, hunt my own food, chart the stars, and write poems about mountains. But I know these days are passing. This morning I made a call to Colorado, and the camp out there offered me a job. I will be leaving Oregon in a week, leaving behind Paul, Henry, and the boys. Leaving behind the meadow. I start wondering if, when I leave this place, when I leave all these guys who don’t share my faith, when I leave these militant women always complaining about men, when I leave the starlight above the mountains, if I will go back to my old faith habits, jumping through hoops, trying to please God or, worse, subscribing to self-help formulas and calling it faith. I hope not. I hope I never lose this perspective. Walking through the meadow on the way over to see Paul, I promise myself if I ever get frustrated with life again, if I ever get into river-deep debt, I will sell it all and move out into the woods, find some people who aren’t like me and learn to love them, and do something even harder, let them love me, receive the love of somebody who doesn’t share my faith system, who doesn’t agree with me about everything, and I will sleep beneath the stars and whisper thank you to the Creator of the universe, as a way of reacquainting myself to an old friend, a friend who says you don’t have to be smart or good-looking or religious or anything; you just have to cling to Him, love Him, need Him, listen to His story.

So go, find your group of people to learn to love, and hope they learn to love you in return. Share the story with them, let them understand life is spirituality. Help heal the pains and hurts of people who have been turned off by commercialism, especially commercialism in Christianity. Let them understand the beauty of God, the purpose of man, is relationships. Jesus came to restore our relationship with God so we can enjoy Him again. I don't think Hollywood will ever be able to show me that.

*Donald Miller: Through Painted Deserts: Light, God, and Beauty on the Open Road, Thomas Nelson, Inc., Nashville, TN, 2005, pp. 244-246

Heaven or Hell

2009-01-24T12:25:00.003-05:00

Kelly has developed an addiction to Grey's Anatomy. This is surprising because Kelly really doesn't like TV. For years she has attempted to get me to limit my TV viewing. Finally, a few years ago I was able to give her a small gift, one night a week without TV.

But I've recently noticed this addiction to Grey's Anatomy. It became apparent when I was traveling frequently last quarter. Kelly would rush home from her Thursday night meeting to turn on Grey's Anatomy. Fortunately for me, work hours were such that her calling me after 10 pm (once the show was off) wasn't too dificult. Most nights we had just finished for the day so her timing was perfect.

It was the most recent episode of Grey's Anatomy, "Stairway to Heaven," (original air date January 22, 2009) that got me thinking. In this episode, Izzie is continuing to have conversations with her dead fiancee, Denny. During the episode, Denny asks Izzie if one person's heaven could be another person's hell.

I possed that question to Kelly this morning over pancakes and she said no. Kelly didn't believe the person "in heaven" would be so oblivious as to not recognize they were causing a "hell" for their partner.

I disagree with my lovely wife. In part, the episode also explored this option. Denny actually asked if his continued presence with Izzie were causing her hell. It certainly appeared to be so. Yet he continued to hang around, talk to her, and make her life difficult. His desire to remain with her (he died the night he proposed, so they never really did have a chance to develop a relationship outside of the hospital), to experience what he imagined to be heaven, was causing extreme pain for Izzie as she attempted to finally move her life beyond Denny.

Yet even had Grey's Anatomy not gone there with the script, I believe there are daily instances where someone is "in heaven" (no, not the literal heaven) and the one they love is in hell. Take for instance every man at the mall with his wife and teenage daughter. Those men are certainly not in heaven.

Or what about the woman who sits at home alone while her husband is "out with the guys?" Maybe they are both in heaven, but in many cases, the women I've encountered are in a hell of their own. "What is he doing tonight? Who is he with? Why do I have to sit here with the screaming baby while he gets to go out?"

I believe that until the world learns the love of God, until we live daily into His edict "love your neighbor as yourself," each of us will find moments when we are in heaven and those around us are in hell.

I hope each day brings me closer to causing fewer of those moments for the ones I love.

Angry with God?

2009-01-21T12:31:00.003-05:00

Sunday night at small group, the conversation turned to anger. One of our group asked if I would consider a post about being angry with God. This was a topic that really intrigued me, so I sat down this morning and did a little probing into the Psalms.

Psalm 22:1-3 (the Message)

"God, God...my God! Why did you dump me
miles from nowhere?

Doubled up with pain, I call to God
all the day long. No answer. Nothing.

I keep at it all night, tossing and turning.

And you! Are you indifferent, above it all,
leaning back on the cushions of Israel's praise?"

Psalm 10:1 (New International Version)

"Why, O LORD, do you stand far off?
Why do you hide yourself in times of trouble?"

Psalm 6:3 (New International Version)

"My soul is in anguish.
How long, O LORD, how long?"

David was not afraid to tell God how he felt. He was able to lay out some very raw emotions, showing us God can handle the truth. How could He not, God created us. He knows everything about us.

Psalm 139:1-4 (Contemporary English Version)

"You have looked deep into my heart, Lord,
and you know all about me.

You know when I am resting or when I am working,
and from heaven you discover my thoughts.

You notice everything I do
and everywhere I go.

Before I even speak a word,
you know what I will say ..."

This God who created us, knows what we are thinking, what we are going to say, even before we do. As God, living outside of time, He understands where we will be emotionally.

So is it OK to be angry with God? I believe so, but there are some guidelines:

1. Do not sin in your anger (Ephesians 4:26). While anger is an acceptable emotion (Jesus was angry in the temple), it is imperative you do not sin in your anger.

2. Do not curse God (Job 2:1-10). Even after he lost his children, his wealth, and his health, Job did not curse God. Job, like David, understood you had to accept the good from God along with the trouble.

3. Allow God to have a place in your heart (Psalm 139:23). Even in our anger with God, we still need to allow Him access to our heart to be able to work healing in our pain. Keep your heart open to Him as you are honest with your emotions.

4. Remember your faith and remain connected to a group of believers (Hebrews 10:22-25). Even in the depths of despair, we need to remember our faith. Being connected to a group of believers who can "spur one another on toward love and good deeds."

God is not shocked when we are honest with Him. I believe He is relieved. Trust Him enough to be honest with your emotions. Then, you will be able to experience the healing David felt in Psalm 51, the Psalm of forgiveness after the Prophet Nathan confronted him on his affair with Bathsheba and subsequent murder of her husband Uriah.

Psalm 51:12-17 (New International Version)

"Restore to me the joy of your salvation
and grant me a willing spirit, to sustain me.

Then I will teach transgressors your ways,
and sinners will turn back to you.

Save me from bloodguilt, O God,
the God who saves me,
and my tongue will sing of your righteousness.

O Lord, open my lips,
and my mouth will declare your praise.

You do not delight in sacrifice, or I would bring it;
you do not take pleasure in burnt offerings.

The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit;
a broken and contrite heart,
O God, you will not despise"

God Bless the President

2009-01-20T10:23:00.002-05:00

Today is Inauguration Day in America, the peaceful passing of the baton from one administration to another. But today is a very special day ... not only is there a changing of the guard from one political party to another, today history is made.

Today Barack Obama becomes the the first African American to hold the office of President of the United States. Congratulations Mr. Obama! May God bless you as you take the leadership of this great nation I love. While I don't agree with many of your political views, I pray for your presidency and ask God to bless America.

Outrageous Nonsense

2009-01-17T15:44:00.003-05:00

While I don't often have free time on Saturday afternoons (most weekends I'm working as video director at church or on the road), sometimes when I'm not working elsewhere, we drive downtown to the Salvation Army to help with "Feed the Hungry." It was during this drive Kelly and I were discussing a sermon she had recently heard from a favorite preacher. I don't know his name, but Kelly hears this Cleveland, Ohio preacher on the radio. As a HUGE Michigan fan, I wonder if anything good could ever come out of Ohio, but Kelly seems to enjoy the message this man brings.

He is currently in James, a great book on Christian living. If you are not familiar with the book of James, take the next week and read all five chapters. It might take you a little longer than a week, this book is full of some heavy truths. However, as you dig deeper into the information provided by Jesus' brother to the early church, you will be shown a tremendous way of living.

The series is currently studying in the second chapter of James. This instantly brought the conversation around to verses 14 - 17.

Dear friends, do you think you'll get anywhere in this if you learn all the right words but never do anything? Does merely talking about faith indicate that a person really has it? For instance, you come upon an old friend dressed in rags and half-starved and say, "Good morning, friend! Be clothed in Christ! Be filled with the Holy Spirit!" and walk off without providing so much as a coat or a cup of soup—where does that get you? Isn't it obvious that God-talk without God-acts is outrageous nonsense? James 2:14-17, The Message.

Talk about hitting right where we were at that very moment. How many Christians sit at home each weekend while 500+ bologna, mustard sandwiches are served to 80+ families each week? How many of those Christians are not even aware such activities happen on a regular basis?

As I'm downtown getting mustard on my shirt sleeve (it doesn't matter how careful you are, somehow mustard will get on you), we talked about how many other programs there are in Lexington to also help. Sunday those who need it can find three different serving locations. During the week there is always a government program or a faith-based program that is offering at least one meal. But Saturday, the only game in town is at the Salvation Army.

Had it not been for a wonderful lady who saw a need nearly 13 years ago, Saturday would be a very sad day for many people in Lexington. But this humble servant of God, a woman who knows her reward is in heaven and doesn't care much about the things here on earth, saw a need, and more importantly got her hands dirty so others less fortunate didn't have to spend a day without something to eat.

It didn't take some new government program, this weekly serve has spanned several mayors, governors, and presidents. It didn't take a mega church underwriting the bill for a multi-course meal. In fact, the only given each week is there will be bologna, mustard sandwiches. Everything beyond that is out of the generosity of local stores who have slowly heard about this weekly event and started to donate day-old breads, cakes, and cookies to supplement the bags handed out to everyone who graces the door of the Salvation Army between 2 and 3 pm each Saturday.

One person can change the world. What need have you noticed in your world? How can you get your hands dirty to help someone less fortunate than yourself? Or are you just anther voice spewing outrageous nonsense?

Can Christians Change the World

2009-01-12T15:58:00.002-05:00

A friend (her blog is linked to this one) asked the following question on her facebook page, "Can Christians change the world or do we just have to wait for Jesus to return?"

I hope she follows up with the results of her impromptu survey, because I'm really curious to know what her friends think.

As for me, I believe we can, the same way Jesus did, one life at a time. While our change won't be permanent (only God can effect permanent change), we can leave the world around us a better place than it was before.

Let me share some examples of individuals around America trying to live Christ to those around them, trying to change their world.

I'm not sure how long the link will remain posted, but I've attached a link to the title of this post. It is a story we heard in church this weekend about possibly the strangest football game ever played. The game was the Grapevine Faith vs. the Gainesville State high school. While I'm not sure if coach Hogan is a Christian, he certainly change the world for the fourteen Gainesville players and their coach that evening in Texas.

And then there is the church just outside Chicago, IL that is changing the world of AIDS victims in Africa through their financial support. This same church is also raising money for the furtherance of the gospel in places around our world where Christians continue to be martyrs for their faith.

Or what about the church in Lexington, KY that spend nearly $70 thousand in 2008 for water projects in Central America and the Kentucky Appalachian mountain regions. This same church has budgeted over $51 thousand in 2009 for food projects in depressed areas of Central Kentucky. This in the midst of a "financial crisis" in America.

So yes Lisa, I believe we can change the world now. Certainly the change Jesus brings with him will be better, but we can't wait. God called us to change the world, starting in Jerusalem, Judea, Samaria, and to the ends of the world.

How have you changed your world?

What Does it Mean to Live as a Christian?

2009-01-09T17:34:00.000-05:00

I was asked today, "What does it mean to live as a Christian?" This question is a tough one to answer, but then isn't any question about life. But the more I thought about it, the easier it became to answer.

As a Christian, we all should take our marching orders from our Father and his Son, Jesus. Fortunately, when he was approached by a teacher of the law and asked about the greatest commandment, he answered:

"The most important one," answered Jesus, "is this: 'Hear, O Israel, the Lord our God, the Lord is one. Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength.' The second is this: 'Love your neighbor as yourself.' There is no commandment greater than these." (Mark 12:29-31, New International Version)

In providing this answer, Jesus demonstrated what living the daily life of a Christian is to be. We are to first love God and then love those around us. To further help us understand how he defined "love your neighbor," Jesus presented the Parable of the Good Samaritan (read Luke 10:25-37).

Daily living the life of a Christian isn't easy, even though Jesus has provided us with our marching orders. Loving God is tough. Each day I must chose to make God first place in my life. Each decision must be filtered through His eyes. Not an easy chore.

And loving my neighbor is even harder. While it is difficult to love God, I have the motivation of His love for me to help. I usually have no such motivation from my neighbors, and certainly have no such motivation from strangers.

And yet, that is what God has called me to do. Love Him, love others as myself. So while finding the answer was easy, finding the ability to live into the answer is much harder. However, it is something I will strive to do each day of my life because I do desire to serve my Father in Heaven and achieve the abundant life he has promised us all (see John 10:10).